30 days... 30 blog posts.... 30 reasons to be thankful!!!!!!! I did it! And, I loved every minute of it. I loved that each and every day, I found something to be really thankful for. I love that even when I was mad at the world, feeling down, or not in the mood to BE thankful.... I posted anyway. Nothing snaps you out of a funk like searching for the good in your life.
I really feel like this month has been theraputic for me. I feel like I am more positive these days. Have a brighter outlook on most things. I just FEEL really good right now and it's hard to imagine that this focus of being thankful dailly doesn't have a huge part to play in that feeling.
When you focus on the GOOD, I firmly believe, you CREATE more good..... when you are positive... the energy around you follows suit. I always believe things will work out..... and they usually do. I rarely dwell in the negative pieces of anything and try very hard to always see the light at the end of the tunnel. Because it's always there... even when you can't see it yet. I know it's there.
So, I've enjoyed my month so much more than I ever thought possible.... I will probably still post often about blessings of this and that.... I think it's a part of me now. Doing something for 30 days in a row makes it feel like a habit....... maybe I have created a habit of being thankful....... and what a wonderful habit to have.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Monday, November 29, 2010
Sanity at Christmas...
I love, love, love this post at Simple Mom today on Staying Sane at Christmas. I could not agree more with it.... and I have tried as hard as I can each year to keep Christmas as stress-free on all of us!!!! I DO say no a lot... and I hope I don't hurt people's feelings, but I'm sure I do!!!!
I have made a comittment to "not split the day" on holidays. That means, Thanksgiving... Easter... Christmas... you get the idea. I don't start out at one family's and go to another... or god-forbid, three or more places! I think it's just insane! You end up staying for a short time only and pissing people off anyway, so you might as well say not to begin with!
But, more importantly, it's just so freakin' stressful on you, your husband, and especially your kids! Kids hate being dragged from one location to the next. Just when the settle in and start playing with whatever toys they got from that house... or whatever kids are there.... you say "time to go to Aunt Bla-Bla's now!!" And if they're anything like my kids, they will probably whine and pitch a fit.
That said, maybe your kids are super easy-going and this works for you. I am not one to judge what you feel you need to do for you.... rather, I am sharing what works for us. My kids are NOT easy-going. I'm certain this is no news flash to any of my readers. ;-) So... Scott and I make decisions to cause the least harm to ourselves on holidays! :-)))))
We have a lot of holiday parties this year it seems! We are going to what we can... but saying no to what we must! For instance... we already comitted to a party on Dec. 18 (Saturday) and then, found out Scott's work party is the 17th. So, I will stay home for that and he will go. I don't think we have to pawn our kids off on a babysitter two nights in a row. To say nothing of the fact that it would cost a fortune! Pick and choose. Rearange and do what you can, in the least stressful way for you... your hubby and your kids.
Put your immediate family first. That's my motto! Me, my hubby and my kids..... so if I say no to you this holiday season... I hope you don't take offense.... just understand that I can only do so much!!!!!!!!
I have made a comittment to "not split the day" on holidays. That means, Thanksgiving... Easter... Christmas... you get the idea. I don't start out at one family's and go to another... or god-forbid, three or more places! I think it's just insane! You end up staying for a short time only and pissing people off anyway, so you might as well say not to begin with!
But, more importantly, it's just so freakin' stressful on you, your husband, and especially your kids! Kids hate being dragged from one location to the next. Just when the settle in and start playing with whatever toys they got from that house... or whatever kids are there.... you say "time to go to Aunt Bla-Bla's now!!" And if they're anything like my kids, they will probably whine and pitch a fit.
That said, maybe your kids are super easy-going and this works for you. I am not one to judge what you feel you need to do for you.... rather, I am sharing what works for us. My kids are NOT easy-going. I'm certain this is no news flash to any of my readers. ;-) So... Scott and I make decisions to cause the least harm to ourselves on holidays! :-)))))
We have a lot of holiday parties this year it seems! We are going to what we can... but saying no to what we must! For instance... we already comitted to a party on Dec. 18 (Saturday) and then, found out Scott's work party is the 17th. So, I will stay home for that and he will go. I don't think we have to pawn our kids off on a babysitter two nights in a row. To say nothing of the fact that it would cost a fortune! Pick and choose. Rearange and do what you can, in the least stressful way for you... your hubby and your kids.
Put your immediate family first. That's my motto! Me, my hubby and my kids..... so if I say no to you this holiday season... I hope you don't take offense.... just understand that I can only do so much!!!!!!!!
Day Twenty-Nine: I am Thankful for Birthday Week....
I am a firm believer in the "birthday week!" A birthday shouldn't just last one day!!! That's just not enough.... so I always celebrate for a good, solid week (or more). ;-)
Today kicks off my birthday week with lunch with some of my favorite co-workers.... then, dinner out tonight with one of my best friends.... then, another lunch tomorrow.... no dinner plans tomorrow cuz Scott will be out of town. Anyone want to bring dinner to my house? :-)))))) I will be stuck at home on my birthday eve with my kids. ;-)
Wednesday, the actual day... I will be off during the day! Like I said, some "me time" in the morning and a girlie-girl lunch in the afternoon! I am not sure what we are doing for dinner. Scott's in charge of planning something... but he is in Lansing until 6:00 pm that night at a meeting, so it would be a late something.... if at all. Maybe just a dinner at home. I'm not sure!!!!!
It's fun to have a reason to go out.... get together... I love celebrations! Celebrations of all kinds!!! So, I look forward to seeing lots of friends and family this week. Yay for being born. :-)))))))))
Today kicks off my birthday week with lunch with some of my favorite co-workers.... then, dinner out tonight with one of my best friends.... then, another lunch tomorrow.... no dinner plans tomorrow cuz Scott will be out of town. Anyone want to bring dinner to my house? :-)))))) I will be stuck at home on my birthday eve with my kids. ;-)
Wednesday, the actual day... I will be off during the day! Like I said, some "me time" in the morning and a girlie-girl lunch in the afternoon! I am not sure what we are doing for dinner. Scott's in charge of planning something... but he is in Lansing until 6:00 pm that night at a meeting, so it would be a late something.... if at all. Maybe just a dinner at home. I'm not sure!!!!!
It's fun to have a reason to go out.... get together... I love celebrations! Celebrations of all kinds!!! So, I look forward to seeing lots of friends and family this week. Yay for being born. :-)))))))))
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Day Twenty-Eight: I am Thankful for Patience...
Although I wish I had some more most days and today in particular. Ugh. Luke just woke up a HUGE grouch. Total stinker. From the moment his eyes opened, he was mad at the world. We attempted going to church. What a freakin' disaster! He had promised he would be good and quiet. He was SO NOT! He was as bad as he's ever been at church. Well, since the incident on Christmas Eve last year anyway. ;-)
I'm beginning to wonder if it's Scott. ;-) He's seriously really good when just I take him! It's really odd. Maybe he senses that Scott is about to blow every time because he's just waiting for Luke to loose it and he is totally mortified. I guess... I understand that shit happens. Kids will be kids. You take him out. It's not the end of the world.
Needless to say..... Luke did not make it through mass. Scott had to take him out of the church......
So, we get home and Luke is still being impossible... and on the way home Ally is so mad that he ruined her experience that she's in a mood too. Neither one of them want to come home. They hate home. Home is boring. Ugh.
Is it totally wrong that I am so hurt when she says that? ( Luke, I understand... he's too young to even realize what he's saying ) I feel like I work fairly hard at making sure our home is one of peace. Comfy. Has what everyone needs. But, it's never enough for her it seems.
So, during lunch, I told her to amend her Christmas List to include those things that will make her WANT to be HOME! Things she will say "I can't wait to get home and play with *fill in the blank!*"
She pretty much sucked at it..... but she tried. She ended up deleting a bunch of things she said she didn't want anymore. Luckily, nothing I had purchased! And added books..... and I think that's about it. We're still working on it.
Oh - she just informed me she added "some clothes" and a laptop. Nice.
Kids.
Luke finally went down for a nap after giving all sorts of grief. We are going through another "I don't ever want to go to sleep" phase... which always seem to coincide with when he seems to need sleep the most! He is tired and grumpy. I am giving the benefit of the doubt here, as we had a hell of a week with schedules. He was up all hours of the night. And sleeping at odd times. Need to work hard to get back on schedule this week.......
Back to work tomorrow... and I'm ready. ;-) Looking forward to getting back into a routine. Looking forward to the week! It's a busy one! Just a couple days of work for me.... then, I'm having a pedicure the morning of my bday and a girlie lunch planned by some great girls.... then, I will get Ally... and the evening is uncertain. Of all the weeks.... Scott has a three day meeting in Lansing.... so he might be staying up there.... there's talk of me going with him for my bday, but we shall see. Hate to mess with the weekly schedule and who might get Ally to school. December 2nd is her First Reconcilliation in the evening, so it's a pretty important day!
Friday, she has a birthday sleepover with her bestest buds...... and I am working an event at the school. Saturday..... can I say that I cannot WAIT until Saturday......?!? SOMERSET DAY with my sister and mother-in-law.......... a day of fabulous shopping.... lunching... coffee drinking... sushi eating and wine! So, while Birthday Week is definitely starting out slow and shitty..... it promises to pick up! :-)
I'm beginning to wonder if it's Scott. ;-) He's seriously really good when just I take him! It's really odd. Maybe he senses that Scott is about to blow every time because he's just waiting for Luke to loose it and he is totally mortified. I guess... I understand that shit happens. Kids will be kids. You take him out. It's not the end of the world.
Needless to say..... Luke did not make it through mass. Scott had to take him out of the church......
So, we get home and Luke is still being impossible... and on the way home Ally is so mad that he ruined her experience that she's in a mood too. Neither one of them want to come home. They hate home. Home is boring. Ugh.
Is it totally wrong that I am so hurt when she says that? ( Luke, I understand... he's too young to even realize what he's saying ) I feel like I work fairly hard at making sure our home is one of peace. Comfy. Has what everyone needs. But, it's never enough for her it seems.
So, during lunch, I told her to amend her Christmas List to include those things that will make her WANT to be HOME! Things she will say "I can't wait to get home and play with *fill in the blank!*"
She pretty much sucked at it..... but she tried. She ended up deleting a bunch of things she said she didn't want anymore. Luckily, nothing I had purchased! And added books..... and I think that's about it. We're still working on it.
Oh - she just informed me she added "some clothes" and a laptop. Nice.
Kids.
Luke finally went down for a nap after giving all sorts of grief. We are going through another "I don't ever want to go to sleep" phase... which always seem to coincide with when he seems to need sleep the most! He is tired and grumpy. I am giving the benefit of the doubt here, as we had a hell of a week with schedules. He was up all hours of the night. And sleeping at odd times. Need to work hard to get back on schedule this week.......
Back to work tomorrow... and I'm ready. ;-) Looking forward to getting back into a routine. Looking forward to the week! It's a busy one! Just a couple days of work for me.... then, I'm having a pedicure the morning of my bday and a girlie lunch planned by some great girls.... then, I will get Ally... and the evening is uncertain. Of all the weeks.... Scott has a three day meeting in Lansing.... so he might be staying up there.... there's talk of me going with him for my bday, but we shall see. Hate to mess with the weekly schedule and who might get Ally to school. December 2nd is her First Reconcilliation in the evening, so it's a pretty important day!
Friday, she has a birthday sleepover with her bestest buds...... and I am working an event at the school. Saturday..... can I say that I cannot WAIT until Saturday......?!? SOMERSET DAY with my sister and mother-in-law.......... a day of fabulous shopping.... lunching... coffee drinking... sushi eating and wine! So, while Birthday Week is definitely starting out slow and shitty..... it promises to pick up! :-)
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Day Twenty-Seven: I am Thankful for a Hubby Who Gets It Done...
I have had a running list of things to do around here... that I need Scott's help with... or him to do altogether. We all have that "honey-do list" I am sure! Well, today... my beloved decided to follow through and do some of the things that I have been asking him to do for so long.
First, he put up the new pictures we recently had taken!!!! We got a 16x20 of our family and a couple 8x10s of the kids... and made a pretty big display of our gorgeous selves on the wall! Looks GREAT!!!!! Also, with the new furniture arrangement in the living room, we needed to move a mirror... so he rehung that for me!!!
ALL of the lights in our master bedroom were out... and require getting the big ladder out of the shed to replace... so he did that today as well....
And, the grand finale.... he took Luke's crib down... and the big boy bed is up once again!!!! Luke has been sleeping in his mattress and box spring on the floor with the crib frame still up. He hasn't slept in the crib for months.... Scott was just so against taking it down after what happened last time. :-))))))
Ally and I ran some errands this afternoon... returns and picked up a few needed things.... then, came home and made a fabulous dinner with leftover turkey.... of course!!!
We watched Mary Poppins this evening. Ally's been dying to see it again since we saw the play. And had a really, really great night in together.
OH!!! And the Spartans won..... and won the Big Ten Championship. GREAT DAY!!!!!!!
First, he put up the new pictures we recently had taken!!!! We got a 16x20 of our family and a couple 8x10s of the kids... and made a pretty big display of our gorgeous selves on the wall! Looks GREAT!!!!! Also, with the new furniture arrangement in the living room, we needed to move a mirror... so he rehung that for me!!!
ALL of the lights in our master bedroom were out... and require getting the big ladder out of the shed to replace... so he did that today as well....
And, the grand finale.... he took Luke's crib down... and the big boy bed is up once again!!!! Luke has been sleeping in his mattress and box spring on the floor with the crib frame still up. He hasn't slept in the crib for months.... Scott was just so against taking it down after what happened last time. :-))))))
Ally and I ran some errands this afternoon... returns and picked up a few needed things.... then, came home and made a fabulous dinner with leftover turkey.... of course!!!
We watched Mary Poppins this evening. Ally's been dying to see it again since we saw the play. And had a really, really great night in together.
OH!!! And the Spartans won..... and won the Big Ten Championship. GREAT DAY!!!!!!!
Oh Luke...
Luke is just saying the funniest things today, so I am keeping another list of his statements today:
- He climbed into my lap and told me his tummy hurt.... says "open it mommy..." which means, pull my shirt up and rub my belly until it feels better. Every time his time hurts he comes up to me and lifts his shirt, grabs my hand and rubs his belly.
- "Sing the Sunshine Song Mommy...." (You are My Sunshine)
- He has started to poop his pants so many times today, I told him no more underwear until he goes... cuz we are running out. He exclaims, looking down "Oh NO!!! What are we gonna do with my PENIS????"
- "I want a peanut butter and jelly sandwich... I sing a song about it..."
- After Daddy told him not to play with the laser level cuz it could hurt his eye, he touches it and freaks out.. runs to me screaming, "my eye! my eye! hold me until it's better....."
- Every time he's trying to stall or delay... "But, but, but... Mommy... but, but, but...."
- "Holy Moly!"
- "No way Jose!"
- Luke has also started using the F-word from time to time. I have no idea where he has heard this word.... ;-) He even uses it in correct context. I am not proud of this... I really need to watch my mouth around him.... but for journalling sake... I need to blog about it. ;-) He says things such as "F-ing mess.... F-ing Mickey (when he's mad at Mickey Mouse apparently!).... Ef it.... and, well, you get the idea. Sometimes, I'm sorry... but it's so hard not to laugh. He climbed into a chair yesterday after lunch.... and just said.... "Ah Ef It!" Scott and I had to walk into the kitchen so he didn't see us hysterical. He always apologizes after. Let's hope this stops before school starts. ;-)
- "I"m gonna BAM it!!!"
- "Hi! I'm a mister!!!"
Friday, November 26, 2010
Day Twenty-Six: I am Thankful for Children that Sleep Until 9am...
The kids must have been some tired puppies cuz they slept until 9 am this morning! A very thankful Mom and Dad were a direct result of this gift!!!!!! They have been up extra late these past few days, with family and all their cousins in town. Too much fun to be sleeping the time away! For the most part, they have been really great with the craziness that the schedule has been lately. The first night the cousins from Kansas City were here, Ally was disappointed she couldn't have a sleepover and she was really upset about that. She was just so excited for Natalie to be here... her cousin that is closest to her in age and a GIRL! :-) I can understand why she was upset. It was a bad reaction... but sometimes understandable. She is a kid after all, and she doesn't get to see Natalie that often anymore...
But, each night after, both kids were great about coming home and going to bed. I think they were just so tired sleep finally sounded like a good option!!!!!!!
Yesterday was a busy day! We got up bright and early to start the turkey we were taking for dinner.... got the kids around (while watching the Thanksgiving Day parade!) and got to my Grandma's around noon to visit with my mom and step dad for a bit. Luke was a stinker and fell asleep in the car on the way home - thank god! I dropped Ally off at my in-laws since everyone was starting to arrive... and came home to help Scott with the final preparations... stuffing... potatoes and turkey were our contributions to the dinner. OH, and wine. Of course. :-)
Luke slept in the car for about an hour and a half... and we made our way to McIntosh's for dinner at 3. The house was chock full of some of our favorite people... and there were plenty of kids to go around. 10 under the age of 9 I do believe!!!! It's so nice for the kids, when there are so many kids!
I love all Scott's Aunts and Uncles... so we had a great time visiting with them. Dinner was amazing. All the food was amazing and delicious! I ate FAR TOO MUCH! I couldn't even eat pie for hours and hours... so I hid a piece in a closet so as to save myself one. :-)))) Adam did too! :-)))) We are so mature.
A very nice day indeed..... and now, we appear to be recovering. Taking it easy at home. Tonight, we are going to a reception for my cousin Joe, who is an amazing artist. He is having a show at Art 634 in Jackson, so many of my family and friends will be gathering there this evening... and going out after! A happy, happy weekend filled with lots and lots of people I love!!!!!!
Snippets of Warm Memories from Thanksgiving:
But, each night after, both kids were great about coming home and going to bed. I think they were just so tired sleep finally sounded like a good option!!!!!!!
Yesterday was a busy day! We got up bright and early to start the turkey we were taking for dinner.... got the kids around (while watching the Thanksgiving Day parade!) and got to my Grandma's around noon to visit with my mom and step dad for a bit. Luke was a stinker and fell asleep in the car on the way home - thank god! I dropped Ally off at my in-laws since everyone was starting to arrive... and came home to help Scott with the final preparations... stuffing... potatoes and turkey were our contributions to the dinner. OH, and wine. Of course. :-)
Luke slept in the car for about an hour and a half... and we made our way to McIntosh's for dinner at 3. The house was chock full of some of our favorite people... and there were plenty of kids to go around. 10 under the age of 9 I do believe!!!! It's so nice for the kids, when there are so many kids!
I love all Scott's Aunts and Uncles... so we had a great time visiting with them. Dinner was amazing. All the food was amazing and delicious! I ate FAR TOO MUCH! I couldn't even eat pie for hours and hours... so I hid a piece in a closet so as to save myself one. :-)))) Adam did too! :-)))) We are so mature.
A very nice day indeed..... and now, we appear to be recovering. Taking it easy at home. Tonight, we are going to a reception for my cousin Joe, who is an amazing artist. He is having a show at Art 634 in Jackson, so many of my family and friends will be gathering there this evening... and going out after! A happy, happy weekend filled with lots and lots of people I love!!!!!!
Snippets of Warm Memories from Thanksgiving:
- Luke reaching over to grab my hand when he saw Santa on the TV while watching the Thanksgiving Day parade. He was in total awe.. and just reached out for me in the sweetest way.
- Ally and Luke jumping and dancing on my bed to Christmas songs while I tried to get dressed.
- Scott and I enjoying an hour of alone time before going to his parents'.... and the yummy wine we shared.
- Luke and Grace running around without their pants....
- Ally crying real tears of sadness when we had to say goodbye to Natalie.
- Watching Luke and Evan play cars together.
- Ally running to hug Grandpa Dave as soon as she saw him.
- Luke and Ally's matching "Ho Ho" jammies.
- The kids all wrestling with Daddy (or Uncle Scott) on the floor.
- Watching Charlie Brown's Thanksgiving.
- Luke asking Uncle Mark "do you want to play with me?"
- Luke asking Uncle Adam to read him books... And Uncle Adam reading to him by the fireplace.
- Inappropriate conversation of what to send Kyle (cousin in the Marines) for Christmas. HAHA!
- Planning the first annual "McIntosh Mexican Christmas Eve!"
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Day Twenty-Five: I am Thankful for my Many Blessings...
Sometimes I think my blessings are too many to count. And how did I get so lucky. Who did I please in a previous life? But... Then I remember how hard I work for what I have. Not only the THINGS I have, but the relationships too. The intangibles. The real things that matter.
Everything takes work. Marriage. Friendships. Kids. Family. It all takes energy. Focus. Commitment. Time.
And I get better at them all the older I get. So, it turns out it makes sense that my blessings grow.... Because I work hard to make them so. The things that are important to me... I will always make my priority. And when you care that much... It has to pay off. Right?!?!
What a day we had. A great crazy day of family, food and love. Loved every minute of it. Even the hard parts. And there will always be hard parts.... Cuz they make the good parts shine so bright.
I hope you found many blessings to be thankful for.... And I hope you continue to work at making many more blessings for yourself too.
-- Post From My iPhone
Everything takes work. Marriage. Friendships. Kids. Family. It all takes energy. Focus. Commitment. Time.
And I get better at them all the older I get. So, it turns out it makes sense that my blessings grow.... Because I work hard to make them so. The things that are important to me... I will always make my priority. And when you care that much... It has to pay off. Right?!?!
What a day we had. A great crazy day of family, food and love. Loved every minute of it. Even the hard parts. And there will always be hard parts.... Cuz they make the good parts shine so bright.
I hope you found many blessings to be thankful for.... And I hope you continue to work at making many more blessings for yourself too.
-- Post From My iPhone
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Day Twenty-Four: I am Thankful for a Herd of Cousins...
Today was such a great day for my kids. All the cousins were here from near and far!!! Jane got some pics of everyone. They ran crazy all over our house and just enjoyed being together!!!!! Pizza for lunch. Tangled (the movie) in the afternoon. A great day for all!!!!
More fun to come tomorrow!!!!!!
-- Post From My iPhone
More fun to come tomorrow!!!!!!
-- Post From My iPhone
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Day Twenty-Three: I am Thankful for What my Children Teach Me...
Yesterday after picking Ally up from gymnastics and having a peaceful dinner, all hell broke loose!!! Ally snapped about something. You never know what is going to set the girl off.... and as you all know, she spirals out of control from there. She yelled. Screamed. Slammed her door (have I mentioned she has actually BROKEN her door from so much slamming???). Told us we were horrid parents... and then, packed some shit up and walked out the front door. She was leaving.
Is it wrong that I simply, calmly, said... "goodbye Ally, I will miss you?" No. I think it was appropriate for the situation.
Luke has to get into the act just because of the stress of it all. At first, when she has fits like that in his presence, he doesn't know what to do. He asks why she's crying, and will even try to talk to her. She will snap at him... hurt his feelings... and then, he too will start lashing out at everything. It's actually a really sad situation because I can see that he genuinely is worried about her and trying to help... and she sends him away crying and pissed off.
Her rants didn't last too long. Long enough. At one point, while summoning up all the patience inside me.... she started yelling about what an awful, mean mom I was. There always seems to be some breaking point for me... and this time, that was it. An awful mom? Really? The mom who just wrote a huge check to your gymnastics class? The mom who is taking you and all your gymnastics girlfriends to an MSU meet, dinner and special things for an evening in a couple weeks? The mom who took you to see Mary Poppins a week ago? Who pays for you to go to a great school? The one who went part time because she thought it was in your best interest for her to spend more time with you? THAT ONE???? THAT MOM????
Good lord girl..... I feel like I have changed and turned my life completely around for you... and willingly so. Happily so. But damn if there is no thanks in return.
Someone recently reminded me: Parenting. The most thankLESS job you'll ever have.
Ain't that the truth???
Something I read recently stated: "God doesn't give you challenges for you to work your way THROUGH them, no, he gives them to you so you can LEARN from them."
So.... I have been trying like hell to hear what my children are trying to say to me. I am working my butt off trying to learn from each and every one of these outbursts.... these trying moments.... and also, trying to really sit and bask in the good, great and damn wonderful moments! Cuz they can turn on me on a dime.
I think more than anything... over this past year.... I am learning to be a more patient person. A more present person. I have to summon this patience up from the depths sometimes... but I try very hard. And I often fail and snap.... but that happens few and farther between... and well, I can't beat myself up about it. I daily try to do what's best for my kids, my family, myself and my husband. And I am learning all the while.
I really do think these outbursts are a result of something missing. Either something Ally is not getting from her parents... or possibly something she just can't get at all that she wants so desperately. There could be bigger issues at play here. Who knows? Time will tell.
Ally will be going to see Dot again in a week or so. She has directly asked to see her again... because she can actually recognize that she has anger in her she can't control. And she "wants help." It breaks my heart that she is intelligent enough to recognize something is off or wrong. But, it makes me so damn proud that she is willing to ask for help and can admit that something is wrong.
She last saw Dot (a children's therapist for those of you that don't know her), when I was pregnant for Luke and she started the fits. So, she was four. And she remembers her... which Dot finds remarkable. She cannot believe she asked directly for her and looks forward to teaching her some techniques and helping her. Just making that phone call last week made me feel better.... like a possible light at the end of our tunnel.....
So, patience.... presence.... and ask for help when we need it. None of us are perfect. These are the things my children teach me. Thanks kids. :-)
Is it wrong that I simply, calmly, said... "goodbye Ally, I will miss you?" No. I think it was appropriate for the situation.
Luke has to get into the act just because of the stress of it all. At first, when she has fits like that in his presence, he doesn't know what to do. He asks why she's crying, and will even try to talk to her. She will snap at him... hurt his feelings... and then, he too will start lashing out at everything. It's actually a really sad situation because I can see that he genuinely is worried about her and trying to help... and she sends him away crying and pissed off.
Her rants didn't last too long. Long enough. At one point, while summoning up all the patience inside me.... she started yelling about what an awful, mean mom I was. There always seems to be some breaking point for me... and this time, that was it. An awful mom? Really? The mom who just wrote a huge check to your gymnastics class? The mom who is taking you and all your gymnastics girlfriends to an MSU meet, dinner and special things for an evening in a couple weeks? The mom who took you to see Mary Poppins a week ago? Who pays for you to go to a great school? The one who went part time because she thought it was in your best interest for her to spend more time with you? THAT ONE???? THAT MOM????
Good lord girl..... I feel like I have changed and turned my life completely around for you... and willingly so. Happily so. But damn if there is no thanks in return.
Someone recently reminded me: Parenting. The most thankLESS job you'll ever have.
Ain't that the truth???
Something I read recently stated: "God doesn't give you challenges for you to work your way THROUGH them, no, he gives them to you so you can LEARN from them."
So.... I have been trying like hell to hear what my children are trying to say to me. I am working my butt off trying to learn from each and every one of these outbursts.... these trying moments.... and also, trying to really sit and bask in the good, great and damn wonderful moments! Cuz they can turn on me on a dime.
I think more than anything... over this past year.... I am learning to be a more patient person. A more present person. I have to summon this patience up from the depths sometimes... but I try very hard. And I often fail and snap.... but that happens few and farther between... and well, I can't beat myself up about it. I daily try to do what's best for my kids, my family, myself and my husband. And I am learning all the while.
I really do think these outbursts are a result of something missing. Either something Ally is not getting from her parents... or possibly something she just can't get at all that she wants so desperately. There could be bigger issues at play here. Who knows? Time will tell.
Ally will be going to see Dot again in a week or so. She has directly asked to see her again... because she can actually recognize that she has anger in her she can't control. And she "wants help." It breaks my heart that she is intelligent enough to recognize something is off or wrong. But, it makes me so damn proud that she is willing to ask for help and can admit that something is wrong.
She last saw Dot (a children's therapist for those of you that don't know her), when I was pregnant for Luke and she started the fits. So, she was four. And she remembers her... which Dot finds remarkable. She cannot believe she asked directly for her and looks forward to teaching her some techniques and helping her. Just making that phone call last week made me feel better.... like a possible light at the end of our tunnel.....
So, patience.... presence.... and ask for help when we need it. None of us are perfect. These are the things my children teach me. Thanks kids. :-)
Monday, November 22, 2010
Day Twenty-Two: I am Thankful for Time with my Family...
Scott and I are off all week together! Hooray! It feels so good to not have to go into work... especially when we are BOTH off at the same time. I know, I know... I have many days I don't have to work. But it's just different when Scott is home too. Feels more special because it doesn't happen so often! It also makes me feel like it's Christmas and the holiday season in general because we always take the weeks around Christmas off together.
So..... I am doubly thankful..... cuz Christmas is just around the corner! I love, love, love this time of the year. Johnny Mathis said it best.... it IS the most wonderful time of the year!!!!! I love the Christmas decorations out in stores, the red Starbucks Christmas cups, the music, the smells, the shopping, and just the general feeling of this season. I am always so happy this time of year. I love giving gifts... finding the perfect gift for everyone! Wrapping presents. Buying the kids Christmas jammies! Oh how I love Christmas jammies!!!! It's a silly little thing... I know... but I just love them. I wonder how long I can get away with making them wear matching jammies? :-)) Gymboree makes adult sizes, so I figure I can totally do this into Ally's teenage years.
This morning, Scott and I each ran some errands... so technically we weren't home, HOME together... but we are now. He is playing with Luke in the basement. Luke is currently attached to a dollhouse that Santa brought for Ally years ago. I am certain he has played with it more in this past month than she EVER has. The dollhouse and his train set (also a gift for Ally from Santa!) are his two loves right now!
Ally has gymnastics after school and is taken by another mom so we don't even have anyplace to be until 5:30. I might go watch her today though... we shall see how I feel. I am still fairly motivated to clean, clean OUT and organize... so I plan to get to that in a moment. I am also gearing up for Christmas shopping and in full list mode! I have all my nieces and nephew done and even a couple things each for the kids! Yay me. :-) I am trying not to go overboard on the kids this year..... but we shall see how that pans out.
Very much looking forward to the week ahead and enjoying every moment! Looking forward to seeing Scott's brother and sister in law and our niece and nephew tomorrow night too! A good week indeed!
So..... I am doubly thankful..... cuz Christmas is just around the corner! I love, love, love this time of the year. Johnny Mathis said it best.... it IS the most wonderful time of the year!!!!! I love the Christmas decorations out in stores, the red Starbucks Christmas cups, the music, the smells, the shopping, and just the general feeling of this season. I am always so happy this time of year. I love giving gifts... finding the perfect gift for everyone! Wrapping presents. Buying the kids Christmas jammies! Oh how I love Christmas jammies!!!! It's a silly little thing... I know... but I just love them. I wonder how long I can get away with making them wear matching jammies? :-)) Gymboree makes adult sizes, so I figure I can totally do this into Ally's teenage years.
This morning, Scott and I each ran some errands... so technically we weren't home, HOME together... but we are now. He is playing with Luke in the basement. Luke is currently attached to a dollhouse that Santa brought for Ally years ago. I am certain he has played with it more in this past month than she EVER has. The dollhouse and his train set (also a gift for Ally from Santa!) are his two loves right now!
Ally has gymnastics after school and is taken by another mom so we don't even have anyplace to be until 5:30. I might go watch her today though... we shall see how I feel. I am still fairly motivated to clean, clean OUT and organize... so I plan to get to that in a moment. I am also gearing up for Christmas shopping and in full list mode! I have all my nieces and nephew done and even a couple things each for the kids! Yay me. :-) I am trying not to go overboard on the kids this year..... but we shall see how that pans out.
Very much looking forward to the week ahead and enjoying every moment! Looking forward to seeing Scott's brother and sister in law and our niece and nephew tomorrow night too! A good week indeed!
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Day Twenty-One: I am Thankful for Girlfriends...
I wrote earlier in the month about how thankful I was to be a girl... and this is truly one of the reasons: Girlfriends! I cannot imagine not having a good, solid group of girlfriends to share life's ups and downs with. And I have some of the BEST!!!!!
I have a core group of girls. "My Girls." They know everything about me. EVERYTHING. And yet, they love me just the same. Maybe even more because they know I am about as imperfect as they come. They have been my closest friends for 16 years. One of them, even MORE because she and I started out as high school friends. Holy shit!!!! That's a long time! We've been together through boyfriends, breakups, marriages, the births of babies, the loss of babies, the loss of parents, and a whole hell of a lotta laughs!!!! We've all lived in same town... we've all lived in different towns and different states... hell, one of us lived in another country for a while. Nothing changed. Our friendship remained. I can't imagine anything happening to diminish my friendship with these three girls. They are my family. My sisters. My first phone call in time of need. My first phone call in time of happiness. My life would be a big empty hole without them...........
Then, there are the numerous other girlfriends in my life. Just as important in their own way... they all provide support of different kinds. There are the other moms in Jackson that I have gotten to know through my sister-in-law, blogging and playdates. I am looking forward to a gathering of these moms tonite! They share motherhood's ups and downs with me... and are often my sounding board and support in times of kid trouble!!!!
There's family... the women... the girls in my family, my sisters, sisters-in-law, mothers, mother-in-law, grandmothers, aunts and cousins. They are each girlfriends in their own way.... and provide endless support to me.
There are some amazing girls that I have gotten to know at work..... my bestest bud at work who I shop with, laugh with and bitch with. Can't imagine not knowing her.
I smile when I think of all these girls in my life. I am amazed that in time of any sort of need... any at all... I would never be alone. All summer long, all it took was a facebook shout out... "I'm going to Nixon... who's in?" And girls would be there. I love the girlfriend network...... and can't imagine a life without it......
I am blessed to be surrounded by amazing women...... most of whom, are reading this post right now! I love you all. :-)
I have a core group of girls. "My Girls." They know everything about me. EVERYTHING. And yet, they love me just the same. Maybe even more because they know I am about as imperfect as they come. They have been my closest friends for 16 years. One of them, even MORE because she and I started out as high school friends. Holy shit!!!! That's a long time! We've been together through boyfriends, breakups, marriages, the births of babies, the loss of babies, the loss of parents, and a whole hell of a lotta laughs!!!! We've all lived in same town... we've all lived in different towns and different states... hell, one of us lived in another country for a while. Nothing changed. Our friendship remained. I can't imagine anything happening to diminish my friendship with these three girls. They are my family. My sisters. My first phone call in time of need. My first phone call in time of happiness. My life would be a big empty hole without them...........
Then, there are the numerous other girlfriends in my life. Just as important in their own way... they all provide support of different kinds. There are the other moms in Jackson that I have gotten to know through my sister-in-law, blogging and playdates. I am looking forward to a gathering of these moms tonite! They share motherhood's ups and downs with me... and are often my sounding board and support in times of kid trouble!!!!
There's family... the women... the girls in my family, my sisters, sisters-in-law, mothers, mother-in-law, grandmothers, aunts and cousins. They are each girlfriends in their own way.... and provide endless support to me.
There are some amazing girls that I have gotten to know at work..... my bestest bud at work who I shop with, laugh with and bitch with. Can't imagine not knowing her.
I smile when I think of all these girls in my life. I am amazed that in time of any sort of need... any at all... I would never be alone. All summer long, all it took was a facebook shout out... "I'm going to Nixon... who's in?" And girls would be there. I love the girlfriend network...... and can't imagine a life without it......
I am blessed to be surrounded by amazing women...... most of whom, are reading this post right now! I love you all. :-)
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Day Twenty: I am Thankful for Date Night Tonight!
Twenty days into my month of being thankful and today I am super thankful and looking forward to a date night with my hubby tonight!!! I can't remember the last time he and I went out. Just the two of us. Yummy dinner. Talk. NO KIDS! We were trying to do date night at least once every other week, but things get busy... and we're down to one sitter... we MUST do a better job at this. I think making date night happen, making time for you to go out as a couple with NO kids is as important as anything you can do for your marriage and your family period!
So, we need to get back into the routine and make it a priority.
Tonight we are going to Nightlife here in Jackson. It's a small bar/restaurant that I always forget about but that has great food and drinks!!! Then, we are SO excited to check out the new piano bar downtown... so that's where we are headed after dinner! Very much looking forward to it!
My mom is in town, so we have a FREE babysitter. HOORAY! :-) Another hard thing about date night... the additional $50 you have to pay a babysitter! I need to find some other sitters as well. We are down to one, Spring Arbor University grad who is doing her student teaching. She will likely leave us soon if/when she finds a new job! We already lost a couple to college after last year.
Anyway.... just really looking forward to the night out. As an added bonus... I am thankful to this time right now, because Scott just took both kids to run some errands, including going to the pet store for some new fish. So, the house is quiet. And, I am drinking some more coffee and enjoying writing this. :-)
A couple weeks ago, Luke threw a ball and smashed Ally's fish tank. That was a fun morning. (sarcasm people... lots of it!). Water EVERYWHERE.... filled up the top drawer of her dresser. Had to wash every article of clothing in her dresser. Take it all apart to dry it. Not to mention.... save fish as they came out the hole of the tank at breakneck speed! Ally was screaming cuz her "fish were gonna die".... Luke was screaming from the chaos of it all.... Scott went running so fast to get something to catch the water that he slipped (wet feet!) and fell in the hallway, bashing into the wall and creating a hole in the wall..... was a fun Saturday that was! :-)))))))
So, one fish survived and has been living in a rubbermaid container. I am interested to see what kind of getup Scott comes back with.
And to see if Luke is up to the challenge of finding a way to destroy this one too. :-) Boys..... ;-)
I gotta say people... this daily posting of something I am truly thankful for has been so refreshing! I find myself focusing on the positive more and more.... and finding ways that I am thankful over and over again! I find that I have put the focus on the good and less emphasis on the challenging... or what one might consider "bad." I just find that I FEEL better all around about the everyday things... about life in general. I might not stop after November is done...... this has been such a great little exercise! Not to mention, the fact that I so enjoy reading what everyone else is thankful for! Whether on Facebook or their blogs!
I can't believe next week is Thanksgiving! Probably my favorite meal of the year! YUM!!!!!!!!
Until then.... I will be thankful for this peaceful time just the two of us, Scott and I... before the week of crazy, family fun!!!!!
Happy Saturday everyone!
So, we need to get back into the routine and make it a priority.
Tonight we are going to Nightlife here in Jackson. It's a small bar/restaurant that I always forget about but that has great food and drinks!!! Then, we are SO excited to check out the new piano bar downtown... so that's where we are headed after dinner! Very much looking forward to it!
My mom is in town, so we have a FREE babysitter. HOORAY! :-) Another hard thing about date night... the additional $50 you have to pay a babysitter! I need to find some other sitters as well. We are down to one, Spring Arbor University grad who is doing her student teaching. She will likely leave us soon if/when she finds a new job! We already lost a couple to college after last year.
Anyway.... just really looking forward to the night out. As an added bonus... I am thankful to this time right now, because Scott just took both kids to run some errands, including going to the pet store for some new fish. So, the house is quiet. And, I am drinking some more coffee and enjoying writing this. :-)
A couple weeks ago, Luke threw a ball and smashed Ally's fish tank. That was a fun morning. (sarcasm people... lots of it!). Water EVERYWHERE.... filled up the top drawer of her dresser. Had to wash every article of clothing in her dresser. Take it all apart to dry it. Not to mention.... save fish as they came out the hole of the tank at breakneck speed! Ally was screaming cuz her "fish were gonna die".... Luke was screaming from the chaos of it all.... Scott went running so fast to get something to catch the water that he slipped (wet feet!) and fell in the hallway, bashing into the wall and creating a hole in the wall..... was a fun Saturday that was! :-)))))))
So, one fish survived and has been living in a rubbermaid container. I am interested to see what kind of getup Scott comes back with.
And to see if Luke is up to the challenge of finding a way to destroy this one too. :-) Boys..... ;-)
I gotta say people... this daily posting of something I am truly thankful for has been so refreshing! I find myself focusing on the positive more and more.... and finding ways that I am thankful over and over again! I find that I have put the focus on the good and less emphasis on the challenging... or what one might consider "bad." I just find that I FEEL better all around about the everyday things... about life in general. I might not stop after November is done...... this has been such a great little exercise! Not to mention, the fact that I so enjoy reading what everyone else is thankful for! Whether on Facebook or their blogs!
I can't believe next week is Thanksgiving! Probably my favorite meal of the year! YUM!!!!!!!!
Until then.... I will be thankful for this peaceful time just the two of us, Scott and I... before the week of crazy, family fun!!!!!
Happy Saturday everyone!
Friday, November 19, 2010
Day Nineteen: I am Thankful for Vacation Time...
When I walked out of the office at 3:00 pm on Wednesday.... I knew I wouldn't see the four walls of my office for 12 days!! Woo hoo!!!!!! I took my normal working days off next week, in addition to my holiday hours.... to make a solid week of no work! Scott is going to take the week off too and I am hoping we can do some fun things together... get some more organizing done around the house... spend some time with family (cuz we have a bunch coming to town for the holiday!) and generally enjoy NOT having to go to work!
Ally has school Monday and Tuesday and a half day Wednesday. I am toying with keeping her home Wednesday entirely, as her cousin from Kansas City will arrive Tuesday night.... and I'm sure Ally will want to spend as much time with her as she can! We shall see how it goes...
After the Thanksgiving week, I am only working two days that week... as I have taken my birthday OFF! Some friends have taken the afternoon off too are going to join me for lunch... and I hopefully spend the morning getting a bit pampered. Am hoping for a massage or pedicure... or something Anything that is just for me cuz dammit I deserve it! :-)
Then, six working days over two weeks.... and then, another two solid weeks off for the holidays! YIPPEE! I just love this time of year............
Ally has school Monday and Tuesday and a half day Wednesday. I am toying with keeping her home Wednesday entirely, as her cousin from Kansas City will arrive Tuesday night.... and I'm sure Ally will want to spend as much time with her as she can! We shall see how it goes...
After the Thanksgiving week, I am only working two days that week... as I have taken my birthday OFF! Some friends have taken the afternoon off too are going to join me for lunch... and I hopefully spend the morning getting a bit pampered. Am hoping for a massage or pedicure... or something Anything that is just for me cuz dammit I deserve it! :-)
Then, six working days over two weeks.... and then, another two solid weeks off for the holidays! YIPPEE! I just love this time of year............
Day Eighteen: I am Thankful for Power....
(sorry this a day late - we lost power yesterday - that's my story and I'm stickin' to it!)
Yesterday, Scott woke up at his normal time and hopped in the shower. It was Thursday, so I didn't have to get up right away and both the kids were sleeping. I fell back asleep after he got up. Hard. That really deep, I just fell asleep, sleep... you know the kind.
Then, in a dream I thought I heard a noise. A thud. The next thing I knew, Ally was in my room asking me "what was happening?" and I could hear Luke screaming!!!! I said the first thing that popped into my head, "Luke must have fallen out of bed." In my half asleep state, this was the best I could do. I had heard a thud. I then, heard Luke screaming bloody murder. This was a logical conclusion!
Okay, then I sensed something was a bit off... it was pitch black! OH!!!!!!!! We lost power!!!!!! At 6:30 am, it's still pretty dark here! And, Luke sleeps with a light on, so that explains his screaming!
I made my way to his room... damn it was dark! Literally had to "feel around" to find him! He was shaking so hard! My poor little man. Grabbed him... made our way back to my room and got in my bed with Ally. Turned my iPhone on. That was the best I had at the time.
Scott all the while was in the shower, in the pitch black... :-)))) He makes his way out and is trying to get some clothes on. He keeps trying to make the kids laugh... cuz they are significantly freaking out.... saying things like... I can't see which way my underwear goes.... and do I have matching socks... this one looks brown and this one looks black!
He finally lights some candles... we grab a flashlight... and are just trying to go about our morning! We get Ally dressed... and she decides, once we have SOME light... that this is pretty cool. Until she realizes we can't make anything more than cereal for breakfast. Once again, morning sucks. ;-)
We can't make coffee here, so Scott decides to at least go to the gas station and get some crap coffee to tide us over until we can make it into town to Starbucks. He goes to the gas station..... they don't have power either! It appears the entire town is in the dark!
So, I pack Luke and all my toiletries up and head to my Grandma's where I can shower and get ready before I have to work in Ally's art class! But first.... straight to Starbucks!!!!! Where I finally get some coffee, hours after I had been up!
I'm not gonna lie - I was a bit concerned about volunteering in art class after last week's Girl Scouts debacle, but Ally was as good as gold.... and it went really, really well. I also made a point to sit at another table and not be the one to help her! Unfortunately, that was the way it had to be. Ally seemed just content to have me there and didn't seem to mind or notice that I avoided helping her directly. There were plenty of parent volunteers there to help out... :-)
I went to pick up Luke at my Grandma's (where my mom is staying) after.... visited for a bit... then, he and I headed to the dreaded grocery store. I freakin' hate grocery shopping... but Luke was as good as can be and made it easy on me! We left the store... he passed out... picked Ally up and headed home. Luke stayed asleep the entire time I unloaded and put away the groceries... so he got a little nap in!
Scott came home early so I could go out with a group of co-workers. We try to have an "after hours" bar night out at least monthly.... and we had a really great time last night. Just laughing and making future party plans. Co-workers are almost like your family, in all the ways that you share your life with them. I have a great bunch! I may not be happy with my boss most days, but the people I work with rock.
A good day...... oh and we DID get our power back sometime when I was out and about! Never did find out what went wrong! Oh well.... I am just happy to have it back!!!!!!
Yesterday, Scott woke up at his normal time and hopped in the shower. It was Thursday, so I didn't have to get up right away and both the kids were sleeping. I fell back asleep after he got up. Hard. That really deep, I just fell asleep, sleep... you know the kind.
Then, in a dream I thought I heard a noise. A thud. The next thing I knew, Ally was in my room asking me "what was happening?" and I could hear Luke screaming!!!! I said the first thing that popped into my head, "Luke must have fallen out of bed." In my half asleep state, this was the best I could do. I had heard a thud. I then, heard Luke screaming bloody murder. This was a logical conclusion!
Okay, then I sensed something was a bit off... it was pitch black! OH!!!!!!!! We lost power!!!!!! At 6:30 am, it's still pretty dark here! And, Luke sleeps with a light on, so that explains his screaming!
I made my way to his room... damn it was dark! Literally had to "feel around" to find him! He was shaking so hard! My poor little man. Grabbed him... made our way back to my room and got in my bed with Ally. Turned my iPhone on. That was the best I had at the time.
Scott all the while was in the shower, in the pitch black... :-)))) He makes his way out and is trying to get some clothes on. He keeps trying to make the kids laugh... cuz they are significantly freaking out.... saying things like... I can't see which way my underwear goes.... and do I have matching socks... this one looks brown and this one looks black!
He finally lights some candles... we grab a flashlight... and are just trying to go about our morning! We get Ally dressed... and she decides, once we have SOME light... that this is pretty cool. Until she realizes we can't make anything more than cereal for breakfast. Once again, morning sucks. ;-)
We can't make coffee here, so Scott decides to at least go to the gas station and get some crap coffee to tide us over until we can make it into town to Starbucks. He goes to the gas station..... they don't have power either! It appears the entire town is in the dark!
So, I pack Luke and all my toiletries up and head to my Grandma's where I can shower and get ready before I have to work in Ally's art class! But first.... straight to Starbucks!!!!! Where I finally get some coffee, hours after I had been up!
I'm not gonna lie - I was a bit concerned about volunteering in art class after last week's Girl Scouts debacle, but Ally was as good as gold.... and it went really, really well. I also made a point to sit at another table and not be the one to help her! Unfortunately, that was the way it had to be. Ally seemed just content to have me there and didn't seem to mind or notice that I avoided helping her directly. There were plenty of parent volunteers there to help out... :-)
I went to pick up Luke at my Grandma's (where my mom is staying) after.... visited for a bit... then, he and I headed to the dreaded grocery store. I freakin' hate grocery shopping... but Luke was as good as can be and made it easy on me! We left the store... he passed out... picked Ally up and headed home. Luke stayed asleep the entire time I unloaded and put away the groceries... so he got a little nap in!
Scott came home early so I could go out with a group of co-workers. We try to have an "after hours" bar night out at least monthly.... and we had a really great time last night. Just laughing and making future party plans. Co-workers are almost like your family, in all the ways that you share your life with them. I have a great bunch! I may not be happy with my boss most days, but the people I work with rock.
A good day...... oh and we DID get our power back sometime when I was out and about! Never did find out what went wrong! Oh well.... I am just happy to have it back!!!!!!
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Day Seventeen: I am Thankful for Family...
I am so blessed to be surrounded by an abundance of family! Near, far and in my house... Family is all around! I live near so very many family members and I still don't see everyone as much as I'd like. But we gather as often as we can!
Some parents are near. Some far. Some really far. But we love one another just the same. Maybe more as the years go on. I have cousins near and far. Aunts, uncles and grandparents all around me. I am so very lucky to be as close with them all as I am!!!!
I have siblings near and far and just yesterday my furthest one confirmed that he and my sis-in-law and my niece, Maggie (just over a year) will be spending Christmas with us!! Maggie will be here Christmas morning. Santa will have to come to Aunt Nicki's. I love it!!!!
I'm so excited to have them here. The kids are too!!! I got the kids matching pj's as I always do and Ally was quick to point out we need to get some for Maggie. They will all be adorable.
There's nuthin' better than family.... Especially during the holidays. And I have the best. :-)
-- Post From My iPhone
Some parents are near. Some far. Some really far. But we love one another just the same. Maybe more as the years go on. I have cousins near and far. Aunts, uncles and grandparents all around me. I am so very lucky to be as close with them all as I am!!!!
I have siblings near and far and just yesterday my furthest one confirmed that he and my sis-in-law and my niece, Maggie (just over a year) will be spending Christmas with us!! Maggie will be here Christmas morning. Santa will have to come to Aunt Nicki's. I love it!!!!
I'm so excited to have them here. The kids are too!!! I got the kids matching pj's as I always do and Ally was quick to point out we need to get some for Maggie. They will all be adorable.
There's nuthin' better than family.... Especially during the holidays. And I have the best. :-)
-- Post From My iPhone
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Day Sixteen: I am Thankful for Music in my Life...
I love, love, love music. Always have and imagine I always will! I can remember always listening to music as a kid. My first stereo/record player, I got when I was only 8. A nice and REAL stereo!!! My first album: Air Supply's Greatest Hits. Oh yeah. I was cool. :-)
I remember doing everything to music... cleaning... my homework, picking up my room.... music put me to sleep... and kept me going in the morning when I had to get up and go! It still does! There's a little radio in my bathroom and I listen to it each and every morning as I am getting ready to leave for work or start my day. I cannot shower without music. When I am cooking in the kitchen, you guesssed it... music is playing! What on earth would we do in our cars without the radio?
The greatest invention for me has really been the iPod and iTunes. I was making playlists before I knew what a playlist WAS!!! Mixed tapes were my first loves! I made them ALL THE TIME! I made them for friends, for boyfriends, for family members.... and of course, for myself! I loved making mix tapes and today, I love making playlists! It's sure a whole lot faster and easier!!!!
I wanted the car I have because it had the hardware to play my iPod built into it. I can control my iPod via the car controls... it's like just my music hard drive. We don't even have a CD player in our house. Just three iPods, two iPhones, an iPad and a MacBook with enough music on it that I could not listen to the same song twice for more than a week, straight.
Have I mentioned I love music? :-)
I especially love LIVE music.... going to a concert is defintely one of my very favorite things to do! It combines hanging out with other people and talking... with listening to music! The perfect combo in my opinion!!!
Yesterday, when Luke and I got home..... he was a FREAKIN' mess. The transition sucks each and every freakin' day. He usually throws a fit when I get to Nana and Papa's to pick him up... and sometimes the fit lasts until we get home. Like yesterday. So, I let him cry it out for a while, and go about my business... and I put some music on. Damn if he doesn't climb up onto the couch and completely fall into a trance and calm down when he hears the muisc. We laid for a bit together and I tried to talk to him about his fit. Of course, reasoning with an almost three year old is tough, but I feld better. :-) And, our night went on calm as can be. He even went to bed (early!) without a word of complaint.
Ally always went to sleep to music as a baby... to this day, she loves music as much as I do probably. We all really love having music on......
Music calms me and gets me going....... it's the perfect companion.... and I am thankful for it each and every day!!!!!!!
I remember doing everything to music... cleaning... my homework, picking up my room.... music put me to sleep... and kept me going in the morning when I had to get up and go! It still does! There's a little radio in my bathroom and I listen to it each and every morning as I am getting ready to leave for work or start my day. I cannot shower without music. When I am cooking in the kitchen, you guesssed it... music is playing! What on earth would we do in our cars without the radio?
The greatest invention for me has really been the iPod and iTunes. I was making playlists before I knew what a playlist WAS!!! Mixed tapes were my first loves! I made them ALL THE TIME! I made them for friends, for boyfriends, for family members.... and of course, for myself! I loved making mix tapes and today, I love making playlists! It's sure a whole lot faster and easier!!!!
I wanted the car I have because it had the hardware to play my iPod built into it. I can control my iPod via the car controls... it's like just my music hard drive. We don't even have a CD player in our house. Just three iPods, two iPhones, an iPad and a MacBook with enough music on it that I could not listen to the same song twice for more than a week, straight.
Have I mentioned I love music? :-)
I especially love LIVE music.... going to a concert is defintely one of my very favorite things to do! It combines hanging out with other people and talking... with listening to music! The perfect combo in my opinion!!!
Yesterday, when Luke and I got home..... he was a FREAKIN' mess. The transition sucks each and every freakin' day. He usually throws a fit when I get to Nana and Papa's to pick him up... and sometimes the fit lasts until we get home. Like yesterday. So, I let him cry it out for a while, and go about my business... and I put some music on. Damn if he doesn't climb up onto the couch and completely fall into a trance and calm down when he hears the muisc. We laid for a bit together and I tried to talk to him about his fit. Of course, reasoning with an almost three year old is tough, but I feld better. :-) And, our night went on calm as can be. He even went to bed (early!) without a word of complaint.
Ally always went to sleep to music as a baby... to this day, she loves music as much as I do probably. We all really love having music on......
Music calms me and gets me going....... it's the perfect companion.... and I am thankful for it each and every day!!!!!!!
Monday, November 15, 2010
Day Fifteen: I am Thankful for Wonderful Coworkers...
Some days I may not feel like coming to work because my boss is making me crazy... or I am not really interested in the task at hand... but I ALWAYS like coming to work to see my coworkers, who are not only the people I work with, they have become great friends!!!
I feel so blessed to work with some amazing women... who support me not only in work, but in life. Some great guys who I've gotten to know and my hubby has gotten to know too... and we now hang out as couples and families. I love when your coworks become friends and family!
I can't imagine the day without chatting with Lindsey about the new arrivals or new sale items at Anthro! I can't imagine not catching up with Kate on how she and that baby inside are doing. Sharing crazy kid stories with Amy. Laughing about what Jim did over the weekend. Letting my grievances out with Stephanie. And just plain bitching with either one of the Heathers.
My coworkers rock... and they get me through the days... and then some! They are the best lunch dates, drinking buddies, and listening ears. It's the people that really make this place feel like home to me.
I am so blessed to work with the most amazing people!!!!!!
I feel so blessed to work with some amazing women... who support me not only in work, but in life. Some great guys who I've gotten to know and my hubby has gotten to know too... and we now hang out as couples and families. I love when your coworks become friends and family!
I can't imagine the day without chatting with Lindsey about the new arrivals or new sale items at Anthro! I can't imagine not catching up with Kate on how she and that baby inside are doing. Sharing crazy kid stories with Amy. Laughing about what Jim did over the weekend. Letting my grievances out with Stephanie. And just plain bitching with either one of the Heathers.
My coworkers rock... and they get me through the days... and then some! They are the best lunch dates, drinking buddies, and listening ears. It's the people that really make this place feel like home to me.
I am so blessed to work with the most amazing people!!!!!!
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Day Fourteen: I am Thankful to be Working Toward a More Simple State of Being...
Whew!!!! Yesterday we did some MAJOR cleaning!!!! Let me tell you... it felt AMAZING!!!! I have never been big on keeping things around. I am always cleaning out closets... weeding out clothes and shoes... getting rid of toys.... you name it. I am big on getting rid of things we don't really need or use. But, lately, I have been reading about and planning on taking that feeling to a higher level. Not only a simple house.. but a more simple state of mind... of being... a way of life.
I am not a simple person.... I am not saying I'm going to start growing my own food and making all my clothes. :-)))) No. That will never be me. But, there are things in my house and in my life that weigh on me. Weigh me down and prevent me from living a life that is fulfilling in every way. I am lucky enough that my hubby feels the same way! He is so supportive in my quest to get rid of "stuff!"
So, after stumbling upon the blog Simple Mom and then, reading her other pages and ordering her book and just loving her message... we started working through the house... first mentally, then talking it out and then, on Saturday.. we dove right in! We started with the room that gives me the most stress - the playroom!!!!!!
Seriously. Kids do not need that many toys!!!!!!! And we had more than our fair share. The play room overwhelmed me daily. I didn't want to pick anything up because there was SO much freakin' stuff I couldn't even begin to put it away or organize it. I would tell the cleaning lady to just avoid it, so I didn't even have the pressure to pick it up. Then, there were the kids... who probably felt the same way I did.... it was so overwhelming, they hardly played down there at all!
So... out it all went. I would say 3/4 of the SHIT that was in there... was taken OUT!!!! And what is left behind... are the toys that are loved... that we have ALL the pieces of... and that all fit on the shelves that are in there. Oh my good god... it feels so good!!! It's a room I can actually sit in now and feel peaceful. I can stay on top of keeping it picked up because there is a place for everything and everything has its place.
While we were in the basement..... we made a few other key changes in our life. The biggest change by far was we took the TV out of the great room on the main floor of our house... and put it in the basement. That's right folks... there is no TV in the room we actually spend the most time in. TV. Another thing that weighs on me. I hate that the kids flip in on in the morning before school. I hate that I use it as a crutch and a babysitter for them so I can do what I want to do. Don't get me wrong. I think there is a time and a place for TV. I don't think it's evil and want to ban it... I just want it to stop being the center of our "living room." So..... we are going to try this for a while. The TV went downstairs... and we have watched a movie and some shows down there... we all go down together as a family, and mostly, the kids want to play in the play room anyway for the last 24 hours anyway!
We did some cleaning out of some more of the basement... and I posted about 15 items to Craigs List. I haven gotten emails on three of the items already and one is already gone! Wooo hooo!!!!! Every bag and item that leaves my house feels so cleansing to me........ I feel weight lifted with each thing that goes out the door.
So... once the TV was gone.... Scott wanted to rearrange the furniture in the living room! He started in while I was in the shower this morning... and just now, we seem to have gotten it exactly how we like it. It's open, inviting... and the furniture is arranged to encourage us to talk and see one another... not all around a TV. There is a couch on the wall that our TV has sat for EIGHT years. Scott was sitting there this evening and said "this is cool... I am sitting in a spot in our living room I have NEVER sat!" It gives you a whole new perspective. It's like a new room. A new home of sorts. It feels really, really good.
It's exciting!!! Embarking upon getting rid of so much. There are things we keep put away in closets and in back rooms.. that while mostly out of sight... are not out of my mind. The fact that these areas are full to the brim with crap... weighs me down. I'm ridding myself of this excess weight and I'm getting rid of anything and everything that is not "useful or beautiful" to me. To us. To the kids.
The kids played an active part in everything we did yesterday. They watched as each and every item went in a bag. They made their peace with it. Said their goodbyes. These kids do not want for anything. Ally, in a way only she can... shocked me by saying... "I know these things will go to a little girl who's mommy can't afford to get her as many toys as I have because I know they sell them cheap at the goodwill right mom?" :-) Right Ally.... you have a good heart my girl.
Going forward, I want to make a conscious effort to think about the things I bring into my house too! I am going to be careful about what I buy, not only for myself, but for the kids... for our household. I have always been big on quality over quantity... but even I get caught up in the moment of something being on sale or a great deal! I can't tell you how many items of clothing I have ready to go that I bought on sale cuz they were a great deal! A great deal? Really..... I hardly wore them! Then, there's the sweater I paid a huge, full price for... that I covet and love... and wear weekly because it's so well made and comfortable I can't imagine not owning it. I could have not purchased a sale sweater or three and bought that one no problem. Quality. Fewer, well made items. Nice things......
Even the nice dining room table is coming back up into my kitchen... cuz come on! What am I saving it for????? I have spent years... EIGHT years keeping it hidden and covered..... what good is it doing me???? I'm going to use it. Daily. Admire it. Love it. Enjoy it!!!!!
I'm going to "use the good china" (this is an expression for me... I own NO good china!).... each and every day.......
Life is simply too short to do anything else!!!!
I challenge you to LIVE life my friends. Uncover the good table. Buy the nice sweater you've been drooling over. And throw away the crap that weighs you down...............
Happy Sunday everyone! Here's to a great week! Keep it simple... but make it beautiful!!!!!
I am not a simple person.... I am not saying I'm going to start growing my own food and making all my clothes. :-)))) No. That will never be me. But, there are things in my house and in my life that weigh on me. Weigh me down and prevent me from living a life that is fulfilling in every way. I am lucky enough that my hubby feels the same way! He is so supportive in my quest to get rid of "stuff!"
So, after stumbling upon the blog Simple Mom and then, reading her other pages and ordering her book and just loving her message... we started working through the house... first mentally, then talking it out and then, on Saturday.. we dove right in! We started with the room that gives me the most stress - the playroom!!!!!!
Seriously. Kids do not need that many toys!!!!!!! And we had more than our fair share. The play room overwhelmed me daily. I didn't want to pick anything up because there was SO much freakin' stuff I couldn't even begin to put it away or organize it. I would tell the cleaning lady to just avoid it, so I didn't even have the pressure to pick it up. Then, there were the kids... who probably felt the same way I did.... it was so overwhelming, they hardly played down there at all!
So... out it all went. I would say 3/4 of the SHIT that was in there... was taken OUT!!!! And what is left behind... are the toys that are loved... that we have ALL the pieces of... and that all fit on the shelves that are in there. Oh my good god... it feels so good!!! It's a room I can actually sit in now and feel peaceful. I can stay on top of keeping it picked up because there is a place for everything and everything has its place.
While we were in the basement..... we made a few other key changes in our life. The biggest change by far was we took the TV out of the great room on the main floor of our house... and put it in the basement. That's right folks... there is no TV in the room we actually spend the most time in. TV. Another thing that weighs on me. I hate that the kids flip in on in the morning before school. I hate that I use it as a crutch and a babysitter for them so I can do what I want to do. Don't get me wrong. I think there is a time and a place for TV. I don't think it's evil and want to ban it... I just want it to stop being the center of our "living room." So..... we are going to try this for a while. The TV went downstairs... and we have watched a movie and some shows down there... we all go down together as a family, and mostly, the kids want to play in the play room anyway for the last 24 hours anyway!
We did some cleaning out of some more of the basement... and I posted about 15 items to Craigs List. I haven gotten emails on three of the items already and one is already gone! Wooo hooo!!!!! Every bag and item that leaves my house feels so cleansing to me........ I feel weight lifted with each thing that goes out the door.
So... once the TV was gone.... Scott wanted to rearrange the furniture in the living room! He started in while I was in the shower this morning... and just now, we seem to have gotten it exactly how we like it. It's open, inviting... and the furniture is arranged to encourage us to talk and see one another... not all around a TV. There is a couch on the wall that our TV has sat for EIGHT years. Scott was sitting there this evening and said "this is cool... I am sitting in a spot in our living room I have NEVER sat!" It gives you a whole new perspective. It's like a new room. A new home of sorts. It feels really, really good.
It's exciting!!! Embarking upon getting rid of so much. There are things we keep put away in closets and in back rooms.. that while mostly out of sight... are not out of my mind. The fact that these areas are full to the brim with crap... weighs me down. I'm ridding myself of this excess weight and I'm getting rid of anything and everything that is not "useful or beautiful" to me. To us. To the kids.
The kids played an active part in everything we did yesterday. They watched as each and every item went in a bag. They made their peace with it. Said their goodbyes. These kids do not want for anything. Ally, in a way only she can... shocked me by saying... "I know these things will go to a little girl who's mommy can't afford to get her as many toys as I have because I know they sell them cheap at the goodwill right mom?" :-) Right Ally.... you have a good heart my girl.
Going forward, I want to make a conscious effort to think about the things I bring into my house too! I am going to be careful about what I buy, not only for myself, but for the kids... for our household. I have always been big on quality over quantity... but even I get caught up in the moment of something being on sale or a great deal! I can't tell you how many items of clothing I have ready to go that I bought on sale cuz they were a great deal! A great deal? Really..... I hardly wore them! Then, there's the sweater I paid a huge, full price for... that I covet and love... and wear weekly because it's so well made and comfortable I can't imagine not owning it. I could have not purchased a sale sweater or three and bought that one no problem. Quality. Fewer, well made items. Nice things......
Even the nice dining room table is coming back up into my kitchen... cuz come on! What am I saving it for????? I have spent years... EIGHT years keeping it hidden and covered..... what good is it doing me???? I'm going to use it. Daily. Admire it. Love it. Enjoy it!!!!!
I'm going to "use the good china" (this is an expression for me... I own NO good china!).... each and every day.......
Life is simply too short to do anything else!!!!
I challenge you to LIVE life my friends. Uncover the good table. Buy the nice sweater you've been drooling over. And throw away the crap that weighs you down...............
Happy Sunday everyone! Here's to a great week! Keep it simple... but make it beautiful!!!!!
Saturday, November 13, 2010
Day Thirteen: I am Thankful for my Mom..
Last night, Ally, my mom, and I went to see Mary Poppins up at Wharton. What a great show!!!! Ally was in awe as she always is when she sees a musical. I love watching her face almost as much as the show itself!!!
I feel so lucky that my mom could join us! Since she has moved from Las Vegas to Columbia, MO, it is easier for her to get here because she can drive. Vegas was not exactly drivable! So, she is in town visiting for a few weeks and we packed some fun into the time!!! Starting with a fabulous play!!!!
I have always been lucky enough to have a great relationship with my mom. We've been more like friends than anything and that can be such a blessing. She has been through a lot of tough shit and I always look up to the amazing person that she is and always will be.
So, today I am thankful to that woman who brought me into this world and made me the person I am today. I love you mom. :-)
-- Post From My iPhone
I feel so lucky that my mom could join us! Since she has moved from Las Vegas to Columbia, MO, it is easier for her to get here because she can drive. Vegas was not exactly drivable! So, she is in town visiting for a few weeks and we packed some fun into the time!!! Starting with a fabulous play!!!!
I have always been lucky enough to have a great relationship with my mom. We've been more like friends than anything and that can be such a blessing. She has been through a lot of tough shit and I always look up to the amazing person that she is and always will be.
So, today I am thankful to that woman who brought me into this world and made me the person I am today. I love you mom. :-)
-- Post From My iPhone
Friday, November 12, 2010
Day Twelve: I am Thankful for Surprises...
Today, Scott surprised me by taking the day off!!!! We had Ally's parent/teacher conference this morning, so he figured we could do that and have the day together! Ally was off school too... so my mom (who is in town for a few weeks!) watched the kids while we went to the conference then went out for a super fabulous breakfast at our favorite place, Anna's!!!! We even had time to run a few errands after, KID FREE... and just be together without anyone demanding something or whining at us. :-)
Ally's conference was fabulous!!! Her teacher couldn't speak highly enough of her and I am just so very proud of her. We knew Ally was a GREAT reader and an excellent writer, but today we also learned that she is at the top of her class in math too! She participates, is eager to raise her hand and answer a question and, what I am most proud of, she is respectful and kind to everyone. A VERY, VERY important trait in my book. You can be as smart as you want, but if you are a little shit... none of that matters. Her teacher said she is always the first one to offer a helping hand to another classmate... will offer a pencil when someone says they don't have one.... and plays with everyone.
The highlight of the conference though, was a "storybook" that Mrs. Engemann shared with us... that Ally had written. She told us, she used it as her shining example in class because she was just so amazed by Ally's writing and work. It was entitled "The Greatest Day" and is about the day that we took her to get her fish. The story contained a lot of detail and you could actually see, hear and feel what Ally did that day. Amazing. :-)
I am so proud of my baby girl...... and so thankful for the surprise of the day from my hubby! Now, I am off to go see Mary Poppins with my girl and my Mom!!!! Girls' night out....... Happy Friday!
Ally's conference was fabulous!!! Her teacher couldn't speak highly enough of her and I am just so very proud of her. We knew Ally was a GREAT reader and an excellent writer, but today we also learned that she is at the top of her class in math too! She participates, is eager to raise her hand and answer a question and, what I am most proud of, she is respectful and kind to everyone. A VERY, VERY important trait in my book. You can be as smart as you want, but if you are a little shit... none of that matters. Her teacher said she is always the first one to offer a helping hand to another classmate... will offer a pencil when someone says they don't have one.... and plays with everyone.
The highlight of the conference though, was a "storybook" that Mrs. Engemann shared with us... that Ally had written. She told us, she used it as her shining example in class because she was just so amazed by Ally's writing and work. It was entitled "The Greatest Day" and is about the day that we took her to get her fish. The story contained a lot of detail and you could actually see, hear and feel what Ally did that day. Amazing. :-)
I am so proud of my baby girl...... and so thankful for the surprise of the day from my hubby! Now, I am off to go see Mary Poppins with my girl and my Mom!!!! Girls' night out....... Happy Friday!
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Taking the Day...
Today, I am taking the day off. Yes, my kids are here (Ally only had a half day and Scott took his lunch hour to bring her home for me).... but I am doing the bare minimum. I'm not so much on strike as just taking a mental health day. ;-)
I am attending to their needs... yes... but I am telling them they need to play on their own. They need to entertain themselves. And the TV is off limits. I have made breakfast for Luke... lunch for them both... then, then have been outside for a couple hours, building with blocks that don't belong outside... but I don't care. They are playing. They are happy. They are leaving me alone.
I will put Luke down for a nap soon and tell Ally she has to do something quietly... and I am going to lay down myself. I have been sipping tea. Reading off and on. And smiling at them every now and again... but forcing them to do as much for themselves as possible.
Tonight, my mom is going to come get Ally and take her to my Grandma's where she is staying... Ally is dying to see her and she just got to town last night.
Tomorrow, I will attend Ally's parent/teacher conference, and after that... I will be back. Day off over. We will go to the Treehouse or do something fun.. and I will live my day for them once again... but today... everyone is going to give mommy a break come hell or highwater. :-) And you know what... that is totally OKAY!!!!!
Hey moms out there.... have you taken the day off lately????? :-)
Day Eleven: I am Thankful for the Dawning of a New Day....
.... cuz yesterday ended up SUCKING!!!! AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
Yesterday was one of those reality checks. It was life kicking me in the stomach saying, "hey... things were going really great, so here ya go... take that!" It was a huge setback in all that I've felt I've accomplished and achieved... and maybe it was just more of a letdown than anything else... but yesterday, in my mind, and in that moment... was pretty damn bad and the fact that I didn't have a breakdown is a freakin' miracle.
Yesterday, I went to work... Luke went to Nana and Papa's and Ally went to school... just like any other Wednesday. But, one Wednesday a month, Ally has Girl Scouts and I was helping out at this meeting. I also made the snack for the meeting... so I spent all evening Tuesday making three pans of brownies, one at a time. I was late to work because I had to cut these brownies as evenly as possible Wednesday morning and get them ready to go. Left work a bit early to get to the meeting early, to help their troop leader set up. So far, so good.....
The girls join us in the girl scout room after school. 20 girls. Whew!!!! They are quite the bundle of energy to try to keep quiet and still after a day in the classroom! I give Monica HUGE props for taking on this challenge. Snack is right away and everyone devours their brownies and things are going well. They then, have some time to talk about various goals and upcoming events... all is going just fine. Other than the occasional outburst from a girl who can't sit still, the girls (all of them!) are doing great! Ally is sitting with her friends, glancing at me every now and then, smiling. I can tell she's just so proud that I am there and that all her friends loved the snack we brought.
Then, we are moving on to the craft/task of the day. The girls are going to make a "Sit Upon" and they are going to earn a badge as a result of completing this task. The actual "Sit Upon" is a little pillow of fleece fabric, tied together and stuffed.... you've seen the blankets and pillows made in this fashion... simple enough for most people/girls to do. But, Ally does not know how to tie.
Yes, she is almost 8 and does not know how to tie. Epic. Mom. Fail.
I can see her start to unravel. As I am passing out supplies, I go to her and attempt to help her... and you can all see where this is going to go from here. Ally does not take direction from me. At. All. There's like a barrier in her brain... "when Mom is teaching me something, I cannot follow!!!" She starts to get more and more frustrated. Her frustration turns to anger. Her anger turns to tears. And, now, even though her friends are trying to be kind and help.... she cannot be brought back to reality. She is completely gone. I cannot reach her.
I take her out of the room and she starts to lose it even more. She screaming. Throwing things. Saying she doesn't care if her friends hear her. She doesn't care if they think she's a baby. She cannot even breathe she's so upset.
I go back into the room... struggling to keep it together myself, and collect our things. Make my apologies to the troop leader and slink out of there... trying to cause as little a scene as possible... even though that ship has certainly sailed.
As we are walking down the stairs... Ally throws her headband at me.... and is now screaming in rage that we are leaving. What? You think we are going to STAY with you acting this way? REALLY????? REALLY?????
We walk to the car.... and at this point, I cannot hold it together. I am crying.... and thinking all the while. Okay, maybe I'm just not strong enough to be a parent. I can't even hold it together when she acts like this. I call Scott, who says he will leave early and go get Luke so I don't have to stop at my in-laws in the midst of what is sure to be a meltdown that will not end anytime soon.
I know my daughter well enough to know she's not soon to work her way out of this one.......
So, we get home... and I go into my room to have a good cry, pull it together and come out to face Ally. She is just screaming and doing cartwheels all over the house.... this is her coping mechanism lately... constant cartwheels.... She's now upset because she won't earn her badge... she's upset because we left.... because Daddy's not home... and she hates me and wishes I wasn't her mom... and wishes I never came to her meeting... and wishes she never had to go back again... and doesn't care of she has no friends.... and the list goes on and on and on.....
She absolutely works herself into a fit... and spirals downward. There is nothing I can say or do to stop it at this point... I guess I just have to let her hit rock bottom.... which unfortunately happens when she has gotten in my face for about two hours and I finally scream back at her... after hours of trying to speak calmly. Reason. Ignore. ( I am making dinner through all of this...) She finally says something that makes me snap and I absolutely scream right back at her.....
And she has won. She finally got a reaction out of me. I have lost the battle. Epic. Mom. Fail. Once again. :-(
I cannot stand the fact that she needs emotions to reach this pinnacle before she can turn it around.... And, I'm not even 100% sure that's what she needed... cuz right after that, Scott and Luke got home... and she appeared to come out of it in their presence.
I don't know how to feel about any of it. I feel like I am failing her in some HUGE way that she can't cope with the easiest of challenges. I worry for how will react in the future.
Then, I wonder if it was just my presence. Did I make it worse because she cannot take direction from me? I tried to talk to her about how she deals with not being able to do something in school... I ask her if she cries when she doesn't understand... and she tells me she doesn't feel that way. That her teacher helps her and explains. That I don't explain things correctly.
Okay????
I know she was just spiraling out of control. That the hurtful things she said weren't really meant. But, I cannot help but feel I am constantly doing so much for her... constantly trying so hard to be present in her life... active in her school... in her activities. I worked full time and could do so little for so long, but now I am more present than ever... and I guess I'm feeling a little sorry for myself cuz dammit, I deserve some freakin' credit for that!!!
So.... here I sit.... crying as I type this and relive it... wondering what I did to earn this difficult child. There were 20 girls in that room... and a least a third of them required help... and not one of them cried or screamed or got that worked up about it. Not one. Her closest friends even tried to help her... and I even got an email from the troop leader that the girls were so worried about her and that some of them worked together to finish hers for her and they plan to give it to her today.
She will still earn her badge, because she did, in fact... "try."
So... I guess... I still earn my badge... because I don't give up on this girl... I keep putting myself out there and I do indeed "try." I can't shelter her from the world of pain... we must continue to go out there and risk her melting down... and hopefully things will continue to get better.... cuz if you've been a reader for a while, you have heard me say for some time now... that they ARE so much better...
This is just a little setback... and this too shall pass.....
Ugh.
Yesterday was one of those reality checks. It was life kicking me in the stomach saying, "hey... things were going really great, so here ya go... take that!" It was a huge setback in all that I've felt I've accomplished and achieved... and maybe it was just more of a letdown than anything else... but yesterday, in my mind, and in that moment... was pretty damn bad and the fact that I didn't have a breakdown is a freakin' miracle.
Yesterday, I went to work... Luke went to Nana and Papa's and Ally went to school... just like any other Wednesday. But, one Wednesday a month, Ally has Girl Scouts and I was helping out at this meeting. I also made the snack for the meeting... so I spent all evening Tuesday making three pans of brownies, one at a time. I was late to work because I had to cut these brownies as evenly as possible Wednesday morning and get them ready to go. Left work a bit early to get to the meeting early, to help their troop leader set up. So far, so good.....
The girls join us in the girl scout room after school. 20 girls. Whew!!!! They are quite the bundle of energy to try to keep quiet and still after a day in the classroom! I give Monica HUGE props for taking on this challenge. Snack is right away and everyone devours their brownies and things are going well. They then, have some time to talk about various goals and upcoming events... all is going just fine. Other than the occasional outburst from a girl who can't sit still, the girls (all of them!) are doing great! Ally is sitting with her friends, glancing at me every now and then, smiling. I can tell she's just so proud that I am there and that all her friends loved the snack we brought.
Then, we are moving on to the craft/task of the day. The girls are going to make a "Sit Upon" and they are going to earn a badge as a result of completing this task. The actual "Sit Upon" is a little pillow of fleece fabric, tied together and stuffed.... you've seen the blankets and pillows made in this fashion... simple enough for most people/girls to do. But, Ally does not know how to tie.
Yes, she is almost 8 and does not know how to tie. Epic. Mom. Fail.
I can see her start to unravel. As I am passing out supplies, I go to her and attempt to help her... and you can all see where this is going to go from here. Ally does not take direction from me. At. All. There's like a barrier in her brain... "when Mom is teaching me something, I cannot follow!!!" She starts to get more and more frustrated. Her frustration turns to anger. Her anger turns to tears. And, now, even though her friends are trying to be kind and help.... she cannot be brought back to reality. She is completely gone. I cannot reach her.
I take her out of the room and she starts to lose it even more. She screaming. Throwing things. Saying she doesn't care if her friends hear her. She doesn't care if they think she's a baby. She cannot even breathe she's so upset.
I go back into the room... struggling to keep it together myself, and collect our things. Make my apologies to the troop leader and slink out of there... trying to cause as little a scene as possible... even though that ship has certainly sailed.
As we are walking down the stairs... Ally throws her headband at me.... and is now screaming in rage that we are leaving. What? You think we are going to STAY with you acting this way? REALLY????? REALLY?????
We walk to the car.... and at this point, I cannot hold it together. I am crying.... and thinking all the while. Okay, maybe I'm just not strong enough to be a parent. I can't even hold it together when she acts like this. I call Scott, who says he will leave early and go get Luke so I don't have to stop at my in-laws in the midst of what is sure to be a meltdown that will not end anytime soon.
I know my daughter well enough to know she's not soon to work her way out of this one.......
So, we get home... and I go into my room to have a good cry, pull it together and come out to face Ally. She is just screaming and doing cartwheels all over the house.... this is her coping mechanism lately... constant cartwheels.... She's now upset because she won't earn her badge... she's upset because we left.... because Daddy's not home... and she hates me and wishes I wasn't her mom... and wishes I never came to her meeting... and wishes she never had to go back again... and doesn't care of she has no friends.... and the list goes on and on and on.....
She absolutely works herself into a fit... and spirals downward. There is nothing I can say or do to stop it at this point... I guess I just have to let her hit rock bottom.... which unfortunately happens when she has gotten in my face for about two hours and I finally scream back at her... after hours of trying to speak calmly. Reason. Ignore. ( I am making dinner through all of this...) She finally says something that makes me snap and I absolutely scream right back at her.....
And she has won. She finally got a reaction out of me. I have lost the battle. Epic. Mom. Fail. Once again. :-(
I cannot stand the fact that she needs emotions to reach this pinnacle before she can turn it around.... And, I'm not even 100% sure that's what she needed... cuz right after that, Scott and Luke got home... and she appeared to come out of it in their presence.
I don't know how to feel about any of it. I feel like I am failing her in some HUGE way that she can't cope with the easiest of challenges. I worry for how will react in the future.
Then, I wonder if it was just my presence. Did I make it worse because she cannot take direction from me? I tried to talk to her about how she deals with not being able to do something in school... I ask her if she cries when she doesn't understand... and she tells me she doesn't feel that way. That her teacher helps her and explains. That I don't explain things correctly.
Okay????
I know she was just spiraling out of control. That the hurtful things she said weren't really meant. But, I cannot help but feel I am constantly doing so much for her... constantly trying so hard to be present in her life... active in her school... in her activities. I worked full time and could do so little for so long, but now I am more present than ever... and I guess I'm feeling a little sorry for myself cuz dammit, I deserve some freakin' credit for that!!!
So.... here I sit.... crying as I type this and relive it... wondering what I did to earn this difficult child. There were 20 girls in that room... and a least a third of them required help... and not one of them cried or screamed or got that worked up about it. Not one. Her closest friends even tried to help her... and I even got an email from the troop leader that the girls were so worried about her and that some of them worked together to finish hers for her and they plan to give it to her today.
She will still earn her badge, because she did, in fact... "try."
So... I guess... I still earn my badge... because I don't give up on this girl... I keep putting myself out there and I do indeed "try." I can't shelter her from the world of pain... we must continue to go out there and risk her melting down... and hopefully things will continue to get better.... cuz if you've been a reader for a while, you have heard me say for some time now... that they ARE so much better...
This is just a little setback... and this too shall pass.....
Ugh.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Day Ten: I am Thankful for my Cleaning Lady...
I will be the first to admit it... I detest cleaning!!! Hate it. On the flip side, I love and NEED a clean house. I feel completely overwhelmed when my house is a mess. In order to maintain my sanity.... I have almost always had a cleaning lady. I am not ashamed to admit it!
I read an article in Parenting once that was about lessons learned from your Mom.... one woman talked about how her Mom taught her to "never do the things in life you don't REALLY want to do...." Of course, there are always times we HAVE to do things we don't want to do.... but she went on to talk about how her Mom always told her that it was always worth it to pay someone else to do the time consuming activities that don't give you joy... and spend that time doing something that DOES!
Some poeple really get a lot of fulfillment out of cleaning their own house. They wear it like a badge of honor.... and I respect that! I get it. I am just not one of those people! I have my house cleaned every other week and it costs me $50/week. That's $100 month to never vacuum, scrub, dust, mop, or clean my toilet. It is worth much more than that to me!!!!!!!!!!!! The bi-weekly cleaning also inspires me to do a deeper clean now and again. When I come home to a super clean house... and everything is in its place... I can then see something that I really want and need to do..... and I will take the time to focus on that.
I love it. LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!! Cleaning ladies are worth their weight in gold. :-) Especially a good one you have a good relationship with! Once they start to know your house and how you live in it... they know just how and what they need to clean. My cleaning lady told me she actually gets a lot of joy out of knowing that she's helping mothers of young children so they can do the important things. She looked around at my playroom and pointed to Ally's art and said "that's what you should be doing with your kids.... not cleaning your bathroom."
Have I told you how much I love her??? :-)
I read an article in Parenting once that was about lessons learned from your Mom.... one woman talked about how her Mom taught her to "never do the things in life you don't REALLY want to do...." Of course, there are always times we HAVE to do things we don't want to do.... but she went on to talk about how her Mom always told her that it was always worth it to pay someone else to do the time consuming activities that don't give you joy... and spend that time doing something that DOES!
Some poeple really get a lot of fulfillment out of cleaning their own house. They wear it like a badge of honor.... and I respect that! I get it. I am just not one of those people! I have my house cleaned every other week and it costs me $50/week. That's $100 month to never vacuum, scrub, dust, mop, or clean my toilet. It is worth much more than that to me!!!!!!!!!!!! The bi-weekly cleaning also inspires me to do a deeper clean now and again. When I come home to a super clean house... and everything is in its place... I can then see something that I really want and need to do..... and I will take the time to focus on that.
I love it. LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!! Cleaning ladies are worth their weight in gold. :-) Especially a good one you have a good relationship with! Once they start to know your house and how you live in it... they know just how and what they need to clean. My cleaning lady told me she actually gets a lot of joy out of knowing that she's helping mothers of young children so they can do the important things. She looked around at my playroom and pointed to Ally's art and said "that's what you should be doing with your kids.... not cleaning your bathroom."
Have I told you how much I love her??? :-)
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Day Nine: I am Thankful for my In-Laws...
Three days a week, Luke and I get in the car and drive a few minutes over to my Mother and Father-in-Law's house. Three mornings a week, Luke is excited not only to see his Grandparents, cuddle with Nana, go to the Library with Papa, but also to see his best friend in the whole world, GRACIE! (Or Fracie as he calls her). I think he even enjoys seeing the babies too. ;-)
My in-laws have watched my kids since the day I went back to work, after being home for five months with Ally. Back then, it was just my Mother-in-Law that was home with Ally each day. I also worked full-time then. So, every day... Five days out of her week, my Mother-in-Law, spent the day with Ally... from five months on to almost 2 years of age... when I decided that both Ally and Mom needed a little break! Ally needed to start learning how to interact with other little ones her age. There were no cousins yet. It was just Ally and the adults (this explains A LOT!!!!). And, I wanted Mom to be able to actually have a day or two each week to do the things she needed to do!!!
So... things went on like that for years.... Ally never went to pre-school for more than three days a week. A couple days each week, she still went to my in-law's. Then, Grace and Luke came along, not too far apart... and Ally went to Kindergarten!!! Luke and Grace started going every day... and Ally joined them after school each day!
I didn't go part-time until March of last year. There were many factors that influenced my decision, but Scott and I truly wanted to ease up on the time committment we received from his parents. They do SO VERY MUCH for us... and frankly, it was starting to wear on us too!!! ;-) We felt a lot of guilt asking for so much of there time... so when the perfect storm came along that allowed me to go part-time... it was a blessing in so many ways! Not that we were unhappy with the care they gave our children... but we just wanted to lessen that burden of having to watch them each and every day.
I want my in-laws to truly enjoy my children and have that chance to spoil them!! And, I think they feel that. We have struck a great balance between the time they spend with Luke (not as much Ally anymore with school!!!) and the time they don't have to watch him! This eases some of our feelings of guilt and allows us to be more at peace with what we all do together. Know what I mean?
Those days of the week that Luke gets to go over there.. he just loves. He and Grace just play the day away in their own little world of make believe. Their little bond is pretty cute to witness. All their poor other cousins or friends... when the two of them are together... there is no one else around. They have even been known to lock us out of the room! :-))))) What characters they are.
I know my in-law's get so much joy out of being with their grandchildren.... and, in turn, we are filled with the peace of mind of knowing that they are loved and happy each day we are away. In addition to the daily help... they are always there when Scott and I need some time for ourselves... to get away and be a couple together! They have never turned us down when we say "we need to go away for the weekend!" Or even, "we need to go to Mexico for a week!" :-)))))) I can honestly say, thanks to my in-law's, my marriage is healthy too! Scott and I are quite blessed to be able to get away together and have someone watch our crazy kids!!!
So... today, as I sit at work... I am thankful to my kids' Nana and Papa!!! They love my kids to pieces and it shows each and every day!!!!!!!!!!!!
My in-laws have watched my kids since the day I went back to work, after being home for five months with Ally. Back then, it was just my Mother-in-Law that was home with Ally each day. I also worked full-time then. So, every day... Five days out of her week, my Mother-in-Law, spent the day with Ally... from five months on to almost 2 years of age... when I decided that both Ally and Mom needed a little break! Ally needed to start learning how to interact with other little ones her age. There were no cousins yet. It was just Ally and the adults (this explains A LOT!!!!). And, I wanted Mom to be able to actually have a day or two each week to do the things she needed to do!!!
So... things went on like that for years.... Ally never went to pre-school for more than three days a week. A couple days each week, she still went to my in-law's. Then, Grace and Luke came along, not too far apart... and Ally went to Kindergarten!!! Luke and Grace started going every day... and Ally joined them after school each day!
I didn't go part-time until March of last year. There were many factors that influenced my decision, but Scott and I truly wanted to ease up on the time committment we received from his parents. They do SO VERY MUCH for us... and frankly, it was starting to wear on us too!!! ;-) We felt a lot of guilt asking for so much of there time... so when the perfect storm came along that allowed me to go part-time... it was a blessing in so many ways! Not that we were unhappy with the care they gave our children... but we just wanted to lessen that burden of having to watch them each and every day.
I want my in-laws to truly enjoy my children and have that chance to spoil them!! And, I think they feel that. We have struck a great balance between the time they spend with Luke (not as much Ally anymore with school!!!) and the time they don't have to watch him! This eases some of our feelings of guilt and allows us to be more at peace with what we all do together. Know what I mean?
Those days of the week that Luke gets to go over there.. he just loves. He and Grace just play the day away in their own little world of make believe. Their little bond is pretty cute to witness. All their poor other cousins or friends... when the two of them are together... there is no one else around. They have even been known to lock us out of the room! :-))))) What characters they are.
I know my in-law's get so much joy out of being with their grandchildren.... and, in turn, we are filled with the peace of mind of knowing that they are loved and happy each day we are away. In addition to the daily help... they are always there when Scott and I need some time for ourselves... to get away and be a couple together! They have never turned us down when we say "we need to go away for the weekend!" Or even, "we need to go to Mexico for a week!" :-)))))) I can honestly say, thanks to my in-law's, my marriage is healthy too! Scott and I are quite blessed to be able to get away together and have someone watch our crazy kids!!!
So... today, as I sit at work... I am thankful to my kids' Nana and Papa!!! They love my kids to pieces and it shows each and every day!!!!!!!!!!!!
Monday, November 8, 2010
Day Eight: I am Thankful for my Hubby...
Today, I am so thankful for my amazing husband... who is a partner to me in every way a person can be! Together, he and I make an unbeatable team. We parent amazing together (most of the time!) and we have the amazing ability to run our household (lately!!!) like a well-run business partnership. I can really say, that the longer we are together, the better WE are!!!
He is a most amazing man. He works his butt off to support us.... allowing me to work part time and be there for our kids and do some a lot of FUN things that I want and need to do for ME! He is a very active parent. He does not expect me to do all the work just because I am home more. He does an equal share of the work around the house, with the kids... and is usually the master chef on the weekends!
The morning routine of getting the kids up, dressed and fed all falls on him. He has always been in charge of this role.... usually cuz it just takes longer for me to get ready!!!! But, this is something he does not HAVE to do... he chooses to do it because he knows how much it helps me out! I hate mornings... he is just more patient in the morning and better equipped to deal with that part of the day. The stress of "after school, dinner and evening" fall to me... but he is right there come bed time and we each usually put a kid down. Stories.... glasses of water and tucking in. ;-)
Most of all.. you have got to give this guy kudos for putting up with me. ;-) When it comes to me, he is the the most generous, giving and patient man in the world. I cannot think of a more perfect ying to my yang. We are absolutely OPPOSITE in just about every way... sometimes that can be a real challenge.... but often times, it really works for us.
Of course, we are not perfect... show me a marriage that is... and I will shoot holes in your theory... but we are pretty darn great.... and what challenges we do have... we are not afraid to face, head on. We are a united front for our kids and they know that Mom and Dad are always in agreement when it comes to our decisions about them... and about most things. We are a team. We always revert back to this concept.
I am constantly proud of our ability to deal and unite around the challenges that are our children. Ally has been difficult and weaker couples would surely start to fall apart... but one thing is for certain, we have always come together for the better of our kids.... and when one person just can't deal, the other always willingly picks of the slack....
He shares my dreams for our future and we talk about our future often. We love to do the same things... concerts and fine wine and food are high on our list of loved pastimes. Travel is another! We love big cities and exploring new places. I love that he joins me in my pursuit of greatness.
I am so very thankful for my hubby who walks this crazy road of life with me... through greatness and shit.... through the sweet and the sour.... through lots of laughter and many tears.... I can't imagine being so thankful for anyone else...............
He is a most amazing man. He works his butt off to support us.... allowing me to work part time and be there for our kids and do some a lot of FUN things that I want and need to do for ME! He is a very active parent. He does not expect me to do all the work just because I am home more. He does an equal share of the work around the house, with the kids... and is usually the master chef on the weekends!
The morning routine of getting the kids up, dressed and fed all falls on him. He has always been in charge of this role.... usually cuz it just takes longer for me to get ready!!!! But, this is something he does not HAVE to do... he chooses to do it because he knows how much it helps me out! I hate mornings... he is just more patient in the morning and better equipped to deal with that part of the day. The stress of "after school, dinner and evening" fall to me... but he is right there come bed time and we each usually put a kid down. Stories.... glasses of water and tucking in. ;-)
Most of all.. you have got to give this guy kudos for putting up with me. ;-) When it comes to me, he is the the most generous, giving and patient man in the world. I cannot think of a more perfect ying to my yang. We are absolutely OPPOSITE in just about every way... sometimes that can be a real challenge.... but often times, it really works for us.
Of course, we are not perfect... show me a marriage that is... and I will shoot holes in your theory... but we are pretty darn great.... and what challenges we do have... we are not afraid to face, head on. We are a united front for our kids and they know that Mom and Dad are always in agreement when it comes to our decisions about them... and about most things. We are a team. We always revert back to this concept.
I am constantly proud of our ability to deal and unite around the challenges that are our children. Ally has been difficult and weaker couples would surely start to fall apart... but one thing is for certain, we have always come together for the better of our kids.... and when one person just can't deal, the other always willingly picks of the slack....
He shares my dreams for our future and we talk about our future often. We love to do the same things... concerts and fine wine and food are high on our list of loved pastimes. Travel is another! We love big cities and exploring new places. I love that he joins me in my pursuit of greatness.
I am so very thankful for my hubby who walks this crazy road of life with me... through greatness and shit.... through the sweet and the sour.... through lots of laughter and many tears.... I can't imagine being so thankful for anyone else...............
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Day Seven: I am Thankful for the Sunny Day...
I'm gonna be really honest here... I wanted to say that today I wasn't thankful for a damn thing cuz I was having one of those days... and was in one of those moods. Yesterday wasn't a great day... Scott and I were snapping at one another... the kids were especially cranky.... and things were just off around here. We had a school fundraiser last night and, while it was fun, unfortunately our moods didn't allow our hearts to be in it and we didn't enjoy our night out as much as I hoped we might. So, this morning was just a continuation of yesterday it seemed.
Scott needed a break from the kids. He was just in a mood and couldn't cope and I could just tell he needed some time.... so I took the kids to Jungle Java. Oh, let me mention this: my freakin' cold is back. So, feeling like an absolute pile of poo... I dragged my kids to the loudest place on earth cuz they really needed a place to run around like the monkey's they are! We hit Jungle Java and then, the park cuz by late afternoon, it was almost 60....
So.... the kids got out and Scott got his much needed day.... and well, I was just cranky about it! In my attempt to try to do what everyone else needed me to do, I didn't handle it as well as I should... and I was and still am just pissed cuz this sinus thing is kicking my butt with its coming and going all the time!!! Add to that, Luke is coughing up a storm AGAIN and I want to SCREAM!!!! No more colds!!!!!!!!! :-(
I am thankful for the sunny day though. Let's say it was grey and cloudy today... just think how my mood would have been then!?! ;-)
Tomorrow is a new day..... and I am hoping it is a better one.... today ended on a good note. The kids were amazing this evening. Playing happily. Going to bed without fuss. The time out and about did them good. So, this month of thankfulness is at least not allowing me to wallow in my misery and feel sorry for myself!!! Onward... no time to be down.... just remember all I have to be thankful for!!!
Scott needed a break from the kids. He was just in a mood and couldn't cope and I could just tell he needed some time.... so I took the kids to Jungle Java. Oh, let me mention this: my freakin' cold is back. So, feeling like an absolute pile of poo... I dragged my kids to the loudest place on earth cuz they really needed a place to run around like the monkey's they are! We hit Jungle Java and then, the park cuz by late afternoon, it was almost 60....
So.... the kids got out and Scott got his much needed day.... and well, I was just cranky about it! In my attempt to try to do what everyone else needed me to do, I didn't handle it as well as I should... and I was and still am just pissed cuz this sinus thing is kicking my butt with its coming and going all the time!!! Add to that, Luke is coughing up a storm AGAIN and I want to SCREAM!!!! No more colds!!!!!!!!! :-(
I am thankful for the sunny day though. Let's say it was grey and cloudy today... just think how my mood would have been then!?! ;-)
Tomorrow is a new day..... and I am hoping it is a better one.... today ended on a good note. The kids were amazing this evening. Playing happily. Going to bed without fuss. The time out and about did them good. So, this month of thankfulness is at least not allowing me to wallow in my misery and feel sorry for myself!!! Onward... no time to be down.... just remember all I have to be thankful for!!!
Saturday, November 6, 2010
A Look Back on Halloween... Through Pictures...
I realize that through all my daily doses of "thankfulness," I have neglected to post pics of the kids from Halloween!!!! So, here was our Halloween.... as told through a series of pictures... enjoy!!
Day Six: I am Thankful for my BIL and SIL...
Today I am thankful for Jane, Adam and their three gorgeous girls, who live close enough that we can get together anytime we want!!!! I think it's awesome when you are not only FAMILY, but you would choose to be FRIENDS with someone... and that's totally how I feel about Jane and Adam. We have a lot of fun when we are together and we try to get together as much as we can!!!
From the moment I was pregnant with Ally, Jane had a bond with her already. I think she was here at our house ever day after she was born... she just loved being an Aunt and holding Ally any chance she got. Then, Luke and Grace came along... and they are just two peas in a pod... twins in their own way. ;) They spend many days together at Nana and Papa's and just play in their own little world in a way that only the two of them know how.
We have gone on vacation together, both as adults (MEXICO BABY!!!) and on many family vacations to the Outer Banks. We always have a great time and I can always count on Adam to be my partner in crime when we need apple pie..... and maybe some more Patron. ;-) HAHA!!!!
Yesterday, we took Ally out to eat to the restaurant of her choice (Red Lobster because the girl LOVES shrimp!!!!) and Jane and Adam and girls joined us! They are always willing to join in celebration even if it's not the easiest thing to do do with twin babies!!! Jane had to feed each of them while we were there, but other than the craziness that kids can be... we had a GREAT little meal and I know Ally really appreciated the night out. She was as good as can be and just so happy to be out with some of her favorite people in the world!
Luke was, well, Luke... but after a little talking to in a stall of the ladies' room, he turned it around and sat in his high chair... and even actually ate something. What a miracle.
So, today I am thankful for being so close and living so close to my BIL and SIL who always know how to have a good time!!!! :-)
From the moment I was pregnant with Ally, Jane had a bond with her already. I think she was here at our house ever day after she was born... she just loved being an Aunt and holding Ally any chance she got. Then, Luke and Grace came along... and they are just two peas in a pod... twins in their own way. ;) They spend many days together at Nana and Papa's and just play in their own little world in a way that only the two of them know how.
We have gone on vacation together, both as adults (MEXICO BABY!!!) and on many family vacations to the Outer Banks. We always have a great time and I can always count on Adam to be my partner in crime when we need apple pie..... and maybe some more Patron. ;-) HAHA!!!!
Yesterday, we took Ally out to eat to the restaurant of her choice (Red Lobster because the girl LOVES shrimp!!!!) and Jane and Adam and girls joined us! They are always willing to join in celebration even if it's not the easiest thing to do do with twin babies!!! Jane had to feed each of them while we were there, but other than the craziness that kids can be... we had a GREAT little meal and I know Ally really appreciated the night out. She was as good as can be and just so happy to be out with some of her favorite people in the world!
Luke was, well, Luke... but after a little talking to in a stall of the ladies' room, he turned it around and sat in his high chair... and even actually ate something. What a miracle.
So, today I am thankful for being so close and living so close to my BIL and SIL who always know how to have a good time!!!! :-)
Friday, November 5, 2010
Day Five: I am Thankful for my Super Smart Girl...
Today is Ally's day! One might argue that just about every day is Ally's Day... or every day is "Kid's Day" rather. Ally always asks on Mother's or Father's Day when Kid's Day is... to which Scott responds each year... "every day is Kid's Day Ally... all I got is today!" Hee... hee... it's true.
Today I am eternally grateful for the little girl who made me a mom. Today I am especially proud of her for her report card!!! She received her first report card of her second grade year at Queens and she got all A's and pluses and goods and excellents! There is quite the variety of grading mechanisms in the second grade!
I am especially proud of the fact that Ally has not only faced this academic challenge and rocked, but that she did it in the face of some obstacles... those obstacles being adjusting to a new school! You are all keenly aware of how difficult those early days and weeks were, but she has just adjusted SO VERY WELL and is now just thriving at Queens! Every day she chatters on about something they did in her class or art class or that Father Tim gave her a hug in the hall or that they played something she enjoys in gym or that church is "way cooler as a school".... or that lunch was awesome.... the list goes on. She seems to be doing so, so well. :-) And I am genuinely happy for her happiness! Not to mention... THANKFUL... because I was so worried about her early on. I knew it was going to be hard at first and I could not have asked for a better transition.
Much of the credit is owed to Ally's fellow classmates! I am constantly impressed by the kindness of many of the girls in her class... especially those with whom she has become close. Not to mention, her amazing teacher, who was new to the school herself this year, so I think brought that perspective into her classroom and helped Ally.
Then, there's the MOM support I've received. The one thing I will say to anyone who listens... is that Queens is truly like a family. I was contacted before school even started to get Ally together with some other girls so she had some familiar faces on that first day... then, the principal was sure to place Ally in class with those girls. When we had that first day from hell, I had mom's there to help me through the heartbreak and more calls and emails to check in after the fact. No one was going to let Ally feel left out. And because of all that kindness and outreach.... you would think Ally has been going there her whole life. She's fitting right in... invited to many a sleepover, birthday party and play date. I am proud of her ability to embrace this change and make such great friends!!! And so many... she has a nice, large diverse group of girls.... girls she does gymnastics with... girls she is in girl scouts with.... girls she just has lots in common with! When I asked her who she wanted at her birthday party... she rattled off a whole list of "very best friends." :-)
In addition to all of this adjustment... Ally seems to be maturing right before my eyes. We have had our share of challenges with this one.... but I firmly believe that so much of her problem has been a level of emotional immaturity. I am happy to say I think we are beginning to turn that corner and Ally is really starting to grow emotionally. This is not to say we don't have a "breakthrough fit" now and again.. but she works her way out of it quickly and is quick to recognize the issue and apologize. I can't ask for more than that right now. I also believe that I have become more patient in my quest to slow down and she certainly picks up on that. I am less likely to lash out at her in anger when she starts to yell... and more likely to handle it in a more patient manner. But... this will NEVER come easy to me. It is a constant challenge and I am constantly reminding myself to stay calm!!!!!!! ;-)
When my kids yell and scream at me, at one another... nothing pisses me off more! My first instinct is to scream right back... which only escalates things out of control. What works for our kids... is for me to remain as calm as can be and literally watch them work through their fit. I've learned this works with both Luke and Ally. It's easier with Luke for certain. I feel like his actions, at almost three, are understandable. I feel like Ally should "know better"... but then, I try to remember that when she was three herself... she did not go through this phase. She was an angel toddler.... it wasn't until four years of age that she really learned how to lose her shit!
When we sought out some professional help cuz I freaked out at this point (I was also pregnant with Luke and couldn't deal!!!), we learned that it's because she never had those 2 and 3 year tantrums... and she had to now go through that developmental phase. UGH! Come on.... that stuff is SO MUCH easier at 2 and 3 people. I know you may not believe it if you are in the midst of it with one of your children... but 4 and 5 and even 6 year old tantrums are so much worse!!!!!!!! Ugh.
Just emotionally immature... and very intelligent. Her mind didn't understand why it felt certain ways... one area of her brain couldn't reason with the other... and now I really think the two are starting to sync! THANK YOU SWEET BABY JESUS!!!!!! :-)
So, today I could not be more thankful for everything that Ally is..... the good, the bad and the really, really shitty. ;-) I love it all..... it makes up exactly who she is... and she is AMAZING!!!!!
Today I am eternally grateful for the little girl who made me a mom. Today I am especially proud of her for her report card!!! She received her first report card of her second grade year at Queens and she got all A's and pluses and goods and excellents! There is quite the variety of grading mechanisms in the second grade!
I am especially proud of the fact that Ally has not only faced this academic challenge and rocked, but that she did it in the face of some obstacles... those obstacles being adjusting to a new school! You are all keenly aware of how difficult those early days and weeks were, but she has just adjusted SO VERY WELL and is now just thriving at Queens! Every day she chatters on about something they did in her class or art class or that Father Tim gave her a hug in the hall or that they played something she enjoys in gym or that church is "way cooler as a school".... or that lunch was awesome.... the list goes on. She seems to be doing so, so well. :-) And I am genuinely happy for her happiness! Not to mention... THANKFUL... because I was so worried about her early on. I knew it was going to be hard at first and I could not have asked for a better transition.
Much of the credit is owed to Ally's fellow classmates! I am constantly impressed by the kindness of many of the girls in her class... especially those with whom she has become close. Not to mention, her amazing teacher, who was new to the school herself this year, so I think brought that perspective into her classroom and helped Ally.
Then, there's the MOM support I've received. The one thing I will say to anyone who listens... is that Queens is truly like a family. I was contacted before school even started to get Ally together with some other girls so she had some familiar faces on that first day... then, the principal was sure to place Ally in class with those girls. When we had that first day from hell, I had mom's there to help me through the heartbreak and more calls and emails to check in after the fact. No one was going to let Ally feel left out. And because of all that kindness and outreach.... you would think Ally has been going there her whole life. She's fitting right in... invited to many a sleepover, birthday party and play date. I am proud of her ability to embrace this change and make such great friends!!! And so many... she has a nice, large diverse group of girls.... girls she does gymnastics with... girls she is in girl scouts with.... girls she just has lots in common with! When I asked her who she wanted at her birthday party... she rattled off a whole list of "very best friends." :-)
In addition to all of this adjustment... Ally seems to be maturing right before my eyes. We have had our share of challenges with this one.... but I firmly believe that so much of her problem has been a level of emotional immaturity. I am happy to say I think we are beginning to turn that corner and Ally is really starting to grow emotionally. This is not to say we don't have a "breakthrough fit" now and again.. but she works her way out of it quickly and is quick to recognize the issue and apologize. I can't ask for more than that right now. I also believe that I have become more patient in my quest to slow down and she certainly picks up on that. I am less likely to lash out at her in anger when she starts to yell... and more likely to handle it in a more patient manner. But... this will NEVER come easy to me. It is a constant challenge and I am constantly reminding myself to stay calm!!!!!!! ;-)
When my kids yell and scream at me, at one another... nothing pisses me off more! My first instinct is to scream right back... which only escalates things out of control. What works for our kids... is for me to remain as calm as can be and literally watch them work through their fit. I've learned this works with both Luke and Ally. It's easier with Luke for certain. I feel like his actions, at almost three, are understandable. I feel like Ally should "know better"... but then, I try to remember that when she was three herself... she did not go through this phase. She was an angel toddler.... it wasn't until four years of age that she really learned how to lose her shit!
When we sought out some professional help cuz I freaked out at this point (I was also pregnant with Luke and couldn't deal!!!), we learned that it's because she never had those 2 and 3 year tantrums... and she had to now go through that developmental phase. UGH! Come on.... that stuff is SO MUCH easier at 2 and 3 people. I know you may not believe it if you are in the midst of it with one of your children... but 4 and 5 and even 6 year old tantrums are so much worse!!!!!!!! Ugh.
Just emotionally immature... and very intelligent. Her mind didn't understand why it felt certain ways... one area of her brain couldn't reason with the other... and now I really think the two are starting to sync! THANK YOU SWEET BABY JESUS!!!!!! :-)
So, today I could not be more thankful for everything that Ally is..... the good, the bad and the really, really shitty. ;-) I love it all..... it makes up exactly who she is... and she is AMAZING!!!!!
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Day Four: I am Thankful for Days with my Little Man...
I went down to part-time this past March... for many, many reasons!!!! One, I wanted to be able to be home with Ally each day after school. She was previously going to my in-laws each day after school, and as my little lady has a tough time with transitions, this meant two transitions each day. One, to Nana's house from school and then, home after being at Nana's. Not to mention, I was getting home after 6 each day and THEN starting dinner, homework and the night routine of bath and bed. Then, my actual job changed a bit to allow me to do such a thing... plus, you all know how I feel about my boss by now. Less time there, meant more sanity for me! ;-)
All those things though.. those job things just ended up being blessings. It all worked in to the perfect storm that allowed and encouraged me to go part-time because it has been the best thing that we have done for our family and as long as I can remember! Our lives have completely changed for the better. Our evenings are not as hectic. More often than not, I can have dinner made before Scott gets home. We can handle the after school activities because I am available to take Ally to them. Then, there are my WHOLE days off, spent just me and Luke (until we go get Ally at 3 or so).
I love these days (Thursdays and Fridays) just he and I. It gives us some time just US.... and allows me to get some extra things done... or spend some time with friends.... or have play dates.... whatever we may want to do each day! It's the perfect combination for me. I don't think I could ever stay home all five days a week. I give those girls who do some MAJOR kudos!!! I like my time at work, using my brain, feeling good about myself, and most of all, interacting with my work friends whom I cherish. I think some day I might go back full time... I assume I will.... but for now, this works best for our lives and our family!
So, today, I am thankful for these days off with my little man (aka - Luke!) :-)
PS - I hope you enjoy the new blog look - thanks to the fabulous and talented, Nicole Barczak!!!
All those things though.. those job things just ended up being blessings. It all worked in to the perfect storm that allowed and encouraged me to go part-time because it has been the best thing that we have done for our family and as long as I can remember! Our lives have completely changed for the better. Our evenings are not as hectic. More often than not, I can have dinner made before Scott gets home. We can handle the after school activities because I am available to take Ally to them. Then, there are my WHOLE days off, spent just me and Luke (until we go get Ally at 3 or so).
I love these days (Thursdays and Fridays) just he and I. It gives us some time just US.... and allows me to get some extra things done... or spend some time with friends.... or have play dates.... whatever we may want to do each day! It's the perfect combination for me. I don't think I could ever stay home all five days a week. I give those girls who do some MAJOR kudos!!! I like my time at work, using my brain, feeling good about myself, and most of all, interacting with my work friends whom I cherish. I think some day I might go back full time... I assume I will.... but for now, this works best for our lives and our family!
So, today, I am thankful for these days off with my little man (aka - Luke!) :-)
PS - I hope you enjoy the new blog look - thanks to the fabulous and talented, Nicole Barczak!!!
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Day Three: I am Thankful for Being a GIRL!
I know some of you are laughing at this statement. Wondering WTF??? But, as I got ready to go to work this morning... and anticipated this evenings hair appointment, I thought to myself... "damn I'm happy to be a girl!"
I am! I love it! I am a girlie girl and I make no apologies. I love my hairdresser and I don't care that I drive over an hour to see him. He is worth the time to drive and the money it costs. I have more gray hair than you would believe and I love the fact that every five weeks, that wonderful man erases the signs of my aging hair! Bye bye gray roots!!!! I will see you no more! (at least for a few weeks anyway!) I love the feel of a nice salon. I love the time spent in that chair, chatting with your stylist... allowing him to use his time and expertise to do whatever he wants to make me look gorgeous!!! I do so love being a girl and going to the salon!
I love picking out something to wear from my extensive wardrobe each morning!!! I love putting the pieces together... today an adorable shorter dress that I've paired with opaque black tights, an cute black stretchy belt and a cute black cardi from my FAVORITE store in the world, Anthropologie. I love even more that I am wearing ridiculously high black suede heels.... that look amazing, but let's face it, are about as low on the comfort scale as you can get! I DON'T CARE! I love being a girl and teetering on my sexy heels!
I love to shop... love it. I love the full experience of it... especially with other GIRLIE GIRLS who love to do the same! I love find to the perfect shoes, sweater, PURSE, dress... and don't even get me started on how much I love designer jeans. I know I can ask the question "does my butt look good in these jeans" and dammit the answer will be yes... cuz those jeans are worth EVERY penny!!!! I love being a girl in my Joe's (Seven's, Paige's, Citizen's or J Brand) jeans!!!!!!!!!!!! :-)
I love that girls need other girls... I love girlfriends and girls' nights out. I love how girls talk to one another and let it all hang out. I love how we rely on one another for support, advice, escape and love. No boy has a bond with his "man friends" that a girl has with her girl friends. We talk about our fears, our hopes, our dreams. We aren't afraid to cry in one another's presence. We can sit around in yoga pants or get dolled up and have a night on the town. Girlfriends are the best. I love being a girl with the best of girlfriends!
I love being a mom....... men can never experience what it feels like to carry a baby for 10 months... to have that little one grow inside you and then share him or her with the rest of the world like a gift you have given to everyone that comes into their presence. I love the bond that I share with my children and being there for them in every way. I love their mere existence and I love knowing that I played the biggest role in that existence. I love being a girl cuz only girls can be MOM'S!!!!
Come on, admit it... nothing is better than being a GIRL!!!!!!
I am! I love it! I am a girlie girl and I make no apologies. I love my hairdresser and I don't care that I drive over an hour to see him. He is worth the time to drive and the money it costs. I have more gray hair than you would believe and I love the fact that every five weeks, that wonderful man erases the signs of my aging hair! Bye bye gray roots!!!! I will see you no more! (at least for a few weeks anyway!) I love the feel of a nice salon. I love the time spent in that chair, chatting with your stylist... allowing him to use his time and expertise to do whatever he wants to make me look gorgeous!!! I do so love being a girl and going to the salon!
I love picking out something to wear from my extensive wardrobe each morning!!! I love putting the pieces together... today an adorable shorter dress that I've paired with opaque black tights, an cute black stretchy belt and a cute black cardi from my FAVORITE store in the world, Anthropologie. I love even more that I am wearing ridiculously high black suede heels.... that look amazing, but let's face it, are about as low on the comfort scale as you can get! I DON'T CARE! I love being a girl and teetering on my sexy heels!
I love to shop... love it. I love the full experience of it... especially with other GIRLIE GIRLS who love to do the same! I love find to the perfect shoes, sweater, PURSE, dress... and don't even get me started on how much I love designer jeans. I know I can ask the question "does my butt look good in these jeans" and dammit the answer will be yes... cuz those jeans are worth EVERY penny!!!! I love being a girl in my Joe's (Seven's, Paige's, Citizen's or J Brand) jeans!!!!!!!!!!!! :-)
I love that girls need other girls... I love girlfriends and girls' nights out. I love how girls talk to one another and let it all hang out. I love how we rely on one another for support, advice, escape and love. No boy has a bond with his "man friends" that a girl has with her girl friends. We talk about our fears, our hopes, our dreams. We aren't afraid to cry in one another's presence. We can sit around in yoga pants or get dolled up and have a night on the town. Girlfriends are the best. I love being a girl with the best of girlfriends!
I love being a mom....... men can never experience what it feels like to carry a baby for 10 months... to have that little one grow inside you and then share him or her with the rest of the world like a gift you have given to everyone that comes into their presence. I love the bond that I share with my children and being there for them in every way. I love their mere existence and I love knowing that I played the biggest role in that existence. I love being a girl cuz only girls can be MOM'S!!!!
Come on, admit it... nothing is better than being a GIRL!!!!!!
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Day Two: I am Thankful for my Freedom....
It's Tuesday, November 2nd!!! Election Day!!!!! So, it is fitting that today I am thankful for the freedoms that I am granted by living in this great country of ours! I am thankful for my freedom, my country and the right to vote!!!
I agree with a friend who recently stated, if you don't vote, you can't complain!!!! I hope you get out there and VOTE!!!! You will feel so good if you do! I stopped on my way to work this morning and it took me about 10 minutes...... It was worth being 10 minutes late to work to excercise my right!
I think I take the freedoms I have living here for granted almost daily. I cannot imagine what life must be like for those who live in anywhere other than this great country. Lately, I have really beeen examining how I feel about WHERE I live... getting down to even a more local level.....
Now I'm gonna jump on my soap box for just a mintue..... so, bear with me. ;-)
Many of you who read my blog, live here in Jackson (or around the area), along with me. I grew up here. Went to St. Joes... JCMS... Lumen Christi... then, left to go to MSU and lived in Dearborn and Ann Arbor until I FREELY chose to return to the area that I grew up in.
I chose to come back. I was not forced. I had a job here. A good job. I liked my job. Scott was working in Detroit, so we lived in Ann Arbor, and do not get me wrong... I freakin' LOVED living in Ann Arbor... but he too, took a job here.... so it made little sense for us to live in a community where we did not work... especially since I was about to have a baby!!!
So, move back to Jackson we did. And complain about Jackson I do. (who am I right now? Yoda? ha!) I have done my share of Jackson bashing... yes, some of the people around here are less than stellar. It's true there is no good mall (let's face it, I judge a town by it's mall) or shopping period.... but lately, I have come to detest that part of me that bashes the very community that provides me and my family money to put food on the table and live this life that I so enjoy living!
Scott and I both work here in Jackson.... for a very large employer of Jackson.... Consumers Energy. Consumers could easily locate to just about anywhere in the state, and there was talk of the headquarters moving before they built the new office building downtown, but stay they did (I am really channeling my inner Yoda today... can't stop!).
So.... here I live in Jackson.... and we make great money.... and we live in a great house... and we are about to build a new one..... and we are comfortable, content, and our children go to a great school..... and there are REALLY, REALLY great people here too! Yes... there is a prison... and there are a lot of trashy people... and there are a lot of scary things... and unemployement is high..... and educaction levels are low..... and teen pregnancy is high........
But, what are we DOING about this? What do I, what do YOU do to help these problems? Do you just bitch about Jackson and call this place that very likely YOU live and WORK and earn money and really, daily CHOOSE to raise your family? There is no one holding a gun to anyone's head saying we must stay here. We choose to. We are not in prison... we don't have to stay.
So, on this election day... in addition to challenging you to VOTE... I challenge you to take ownership of your town. Stop bashing Jackson (even though it can be so easy to do - I know I put myself in this group!) and start lifting it up! Look for the good..... focus on the good things here! And come to peace with the fact that you chose to be here and you are truly here for a reason!
So, what is GOOD about living here? What do you LIKE? I like the fact that the cost of living is low. I can afford to live in a nice home, and I know I won't pay a million dollars for it! I love the school that my daughter goes to. I love the Jackson School of the Arts. I love the locally owned businesses that stay open against all odds, The Toy House, Anna's, Cork and Cap, and the Lilac Tree. I love the parks. The Parlour.
But, most of all, I love that my family is here...... and that is the biggest reason, next to our jobs, that we are here. I like having my in-laws down the road... my brother and sister in law minutes away.... and all my aunts, uncles, grandma and even a cousin or two... a quick car drive away. I love that Luke and Ally will grow up close to some of their cousins.... because I remember getting together every Sunday with many of mine. Every birthday was celebrated with cake and ice cream and lots of presents, but even more family.
So people... make your peace with where you are geographically. You're here for a reason too. Maybe it's your family. Maybe is a great job. Maybe you just settled and maybe you truly wish you were somewhere else. If so, take steps to make the move... but in the meantime... stop complaining unless you're doing something about it. I promise not to hold a gun to your head.... even though, if you're reading this blog, I must like you and like having you around. ;-)
We are all free to move about as we please....... grow where you are planted...... :-)
I agree with a friend who recently stated, if you don't vote, you can't complain!!!! I hope you get out there and VOTE!!!! You will feel so good if you do! I stopped on my way to work this morning and it took me about 10 minutes...... It was worth being 10 minutes late to work to excercise my right!
I think I take the freedoms I have living here for granted almost daily. I cannot imagine what life must be like for those who live in anywhere other than this great country. Lately, I have really beeen examining how I feel about WHERE I live... getting down to even a more local level.....
Now I'm gonna jump on my soap box for just a mintue..... so, bear with me. ;-)
Many of you who read my blog, live here in Jackson (or around the area), along with me. I grew up here. Went to St. Joes... JCMS... Lumen Christi... then, left to go to MSU and lived in Dearborn and Ann Arbor until I FREELY chose to return to the area that I grew up in.
I chose to come back. I was not forced. I had a job here. A good job. I liked my job. Scott was working in Detroit, so we lived in Ann Arbor, and do not get me wrong... I freakin' LOVED living in Ann Arbor... but he too, took a job here.... so it made little sense for us to live in a community where we did not work... especially since I was about to have a baby!!!
So, move back to Jackson we did. And complain about Jackson I do. (who am I right now? Yoda? ha!) I have done my share of Jackson bashing... yes, some of the people around here are less than stellar. It's true there is no good mall (let's face it, I judge a town by it's mall) or shopping period.... but lately, I have come to detest that part of me that bashes the very community that provides me and my family money to put food on the table and live this life that I so enjoy living!
Scott and I both work here in Jackson.... for a very large employer of Jackson.... Consumers Energy. Consumers could easily locate to just about anywhere in the state, and there was talk of the headquarters moving before they built the new office building downtown, but stay they did (I am really channeling my inner Yoda today... can't stop!).
So.... here I live in Jackson.... and we make great money.... and we live in a great house... and we are about to build a new one..... and we are comfortable, content, and our children go to a great school..... and there are REALLY, REALLY great people here too! Yes... there is a prison... and there are a lot of trashy people... and there are a lot of scary things... and unemployement is high..... and educaction levels are low..... and teen pregnancy is high........
But, what are we DOING about this? What do I, what do YOU do to help these problems? Do you just bitch about Jackson and call this place that very likely YOU live and WORK and earn money and really, daily CHOOSE to raise your family? There is no one holding a gun to anyone's head saying we must stay here. We choose to. We are not in prison... we don't have to stay.
So, on this election day... in addition to challenging you to VOTE... I challenge you to take ownership of your town. Stop bashing Jackson (even though it can be so easy to do - I know I put myself in this group!) and start lifting it up! Look for the good..... focus on the good things here! And come to peace with the fact that you chose to be here and you are truly here for a reason!
So, what is GOOD about living here? What do you LIKE? I like the fact that the cost of living is low. I can afford to live in a nice home, and I know I won't pay a million dollars for it! I love the school that my daughter goes to. I love the Jackson School of the Arts. I love the locally owned businesses that stay open against all odds, The Toy House, Anna's, Cork and Cap, and the Lilac Tree. I love the parks. The Parlour.
But, most of all, I love that my family is here...... and that is the biggest reason, next to our jobs, that we are here. I like having my in-laws down the road... my brother and sister in law minutes away.... and all my aunts, uncles, grandma and even a cousin or two... a quick car drive away. I love that Luke and Ally will grow up close to some of their cousins.... because I remember getting together every Sunday with many of mine. Every birthday was celebrated with cake and ice cream and lots of presents, but even more family.
So people... make your peace with where you are geographically. You're here for a reason too. Maybe it's your family. Maybe is a great job. Maybe you just settled and maybe you truly wish you were somewhere else. If so, take steps to make the move... but in the meantime... stop complaining unless you're doing something about it. I promise not to hold a gun to your head.... even though, if you're reading this blog, I must like you and like having you around. ;-)
We are all free to move about as we please....... grow where you are planted...... :-)
Monday, November 1, 2010
30 Days, 30 Reasons to be Thankful...
So, it's that NoBloPoMo month again!!!!! And, I've decided to modify it for my purposes.... this month, I am going to blog each day about something I am thankful for! November is the month of Thanksgiving and I cannot imagine a better way to spend each day than writing about all amazing GOOD things in my life. All the blessings that surround me each and EVERY day!!!!!!
I am also doing this publicly on Facebook. Each day my status will be something I am thankful for. The status and the blog post will match each day.... so if you see something interesing in my status, you might want to head over to the blog to see just WHY I might be thankful for that particular thing today!
Today I am thankful for Starbucks........ :-)
I am thankful for Starbucks because starting at exactly 11:47 pm, my son was up almost every freakin' hour last night!!!! (I was in bed and asleep before 10, myself!) And, the one time I DID have a two/three hour stretch without him.... I couldn't fall back asleep!!!! I literally got no sleep last night!!!!!!! So, today, I am 100% thankful for that glorious hot beverage. It the only thing keeping me going!!!
Halloween is just too much to bear for Luke. The candy, specifically, the chocolate apparently makes him a rabid beast!!! He must have had 9 or 10 chocolate bars or M&Ms yesterday. Probably more. He has SUCH a sweet tooth! Ally can totally take or leave it. She hardly every asks for candy.... or even finishes a cupcake. She's more like me in that regard. I am not a big sweets person.... give me a bag of chips anyday!
So, starting with a trip to Nana's for our first "trick or treat" of the season.... Luke just inhaled chocolate like it might run away from him and never come around again. He ate it like he needed it to sustain life! It was wild! We had to put the bowl of candy we had for the trick or treaters up in between each knock on the door because Luke literally couldn't control himself. Every time I turned around, he was shoving a cholcolate bar in his little face! He was covered in it.
The only thing I can think is that chocolate contains caffeine and he was essentially the equvilent of an adult after a few espresso shots. He doesn't eat a lot of chocolate regularly, and he certainly hasn't acquired a taste for coffee as of yet.... so his little body was full of more caffeine than ever maybe??? I say this because he didn't have any real REASON for being up. Nothing hurt. He wasn't really upset... he just looked WIDE awake every time I went in there!!!!! :-))))))) I wonder if he slept at all??????
He is so funny in themiddle of the night. I go in and ask what's wrong each time, try to do what I can without staying too long or making it seem like there's hope of him being allowed to get up....and I tend to his needs and say "It's time to lsleep now. Luke needs his sleep. Mommy needs her sleep." And he always looks up with his baby blues and says "okay mommy...." And I think he really tried each time, he was just AWAKE!
Ugh. I need to go downstairs and get more coffee! I am doubly thankful for Starbucks here at work! :-) I swear I am powered by coffee more often than not... but I imagine just about every parent says that!!!!!
What are YOU thankful for today????
I am also doing this publicly on Facebook. Each day my status will be something I am thankful for. The status and the blog post will match each day.... so if you see something interesing in my status, you might want to head over to the blog to see just WHY I might be thankful for that particular thing today!
Today I am thankful for Starbucks........ :-)
I am thankful for Starbucks because starting at exactly 11:47 pm, my son was up almost every freakin' hour last night!!!! (I was in bed and asleep before 10, myself!) And, the one time I DID have a two/three hour stretch without him.... I couldn't fall back asleep!!!! I literally got no sleep last night!!!!!!! So, today, I am 100% thankful for that glorious hot beverage. It the only thing keeping me going!!!
Halloween is just too much to bear for Luke. The candy, specifically, the chocolate apparently makes him a rabid beast!!! He must have had 9 or 10 chocolate bars or M&Ms yesterday. Probably more. He has SUCH a sweet tooth! Ally can totally take or leave it. She hardly every asks for candy.... or even finishes a cupcake. She's more like me in that regard. I am not a big sweets person.... give me a bag of chips anyday!
So, starting with a trip to Nana's for our first "trick or treat" of the season.... Luke just inhaled chocolate like it might run away from him and never come around again. He ate it like he needed it to sustain life! It was wild! We had to put the bowl of candy we had for the trick or treaters up in between each knock on the door because Luke literally couldn't control himself. Every time I turned around, he was shoving a cholcolate bar in his little face! He was covered in it.
The only thing I can think is that chocolate contains caffeine and he was essentially the equvilent of an adult after a few espresso shots. He doesn't eat a lot of chocolate regularly, and he certainly hasn't acquired a taste for coffee as of yet.... so his little body was full of more caffeine than ever maybe??? I say this because he didn't have any real REASON for being up. Nothing hurt. He wasn't really upset... he just looked WIDE awake every time I went in there!!!!! :-))))))) I wonder if he slept at all??????
He is so funny in themiddle of the night. I go in and ask what's wrong each time, try to do what I can without staying too long or making it seem like there's hope of him being allowed to get up....and I tend to his needs and say "It's time to lsleep now. Luke needs his sleep. Mommy needs her sleep." And he always looks up with his baby blues and says "okay mommy...." And I think he really tried each time, he was just AWAKE!
Ugh. I need to go downstairs and get more coffee! I am doubly thankful for Starbucks here at work! :-) I swear I am powered by coffee more often than not... but I imagine just about every parent says that!!!!!
What are YOU thankful for today????
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