The McIntosh Family Goes Skiing...

This past weekend the McIntosh family went skiing for the very first time!  It was SO MUCH FUN!!!!!!!!!

Some friends of ours invited us, along with four other couples (for a total of six couples and 12 kids!!!) up to a house they rented in Harbor Springs. First of all - the house was GORGEOUS!  Right on Lake Michigan in Harbor and just amazing!  The view was to die for.  This would be an awesome place to rent in the summer for sure!!!  But, as it was, we enjoyed it just as well in the winter. The lake was still just as amazing to look out on.... and the house itself was worthy of staying inside and enjoying!!!!

We arrived Friday and spent an evening hanging, baking, cooking and drinking with the entire crew! The kids enjoyed the ping pong table, playing Just Dance, doing gymnastics and playing all sorts of hide and seek games.  Three days was the perfect amount of together time to have no fights or issues arise!

Saturday we got up and made a big breakfast together, but by about noon we were out at Nubs Nob renting our skis and getting excited to hit the slopes!  Okay - the slope. The bunny hill to be exact.  How nice is it that the "beginner area" is totally free????!!!  For right around $50 the entire family just rented our equipment and skied for free!  Even Luke donned the skis - I was so proud of him!

Ally was hesitant at first and got extremely frustrated.  Thank god for another dad (Rich) to the rescue. One of the dads along with us was a great skier and an even better teacher!  He waved us parents away and just took Ally with him. He worked with her on flat ground... teaching her how to fall, how to get up when she fell and the basics for how to hold her body, legs and maneuver her skis. Then, he gave her no choice... took her on the lift and up they went!

She came down the hill, falling a few times... but kept at it... and instantly fell in love.  Once she was settled, Rich came over and took me under his wing.  He pretty much gave ME no choice either... up the lift I went.  Can I first say I don't even like the ski lift? I am not a fan of heights?  ;-)

But, after 7 or 8 falls down the hill the first time... and only a couple the second and third.... I was absolutely exhilarated and beyond proud of myself that I DID IT!!!!!!!!

That night, we all ate and drank some more and basked in the glow of a great day out skiing.  Enjoying Michigan winter - for one of the first times in my life! I am just so damn excited that our family has found something new to enjoy together and I hope we keep it going... and do some more skiing next winter!!

What an amazing weekend!!!!!

Luke....

Luke got a haircut. He's also an angel when he sleeps. He ran a zillion errands with me today. He worked lunch duty at school. Sat through two meetings and a big people lunch. He went to work with me and was so good while we were there. He went to the store - a chore we both hate. He put up with me packing and being generally grumpy cuz I overwhelmed with all I have to do tonite. He has been such a good kid.

Love him to pieces.

What Luke and I do in our Off Time....

The Age of Social Media...

I was over reading "my girl's" blog on Momastery.  (You know like Glennon and I are best buds and she can be called "my girl.")  She makes me think. A lot. Not something I need help with.... as I tend to think myself to death most days... but usually, she makes me think good things that allow me to cope with the daily life of being a parent, wife, friend, employee, citizen and child of god.

She makes me think bigger and outside of myself.

But, she also makes me question this age of social media.  The age in which many moms blog about their kids. Or women blog about their lives, their favorite recipes and their ideas for staying organized.

Sometimes, when I am in the right mood... this is all so wonderful and helpful.  But man, sometimes I get really, REALLY overwhelmed.

Like really!

As women, we put a lot of pressure on ourselves.  Men do to but I can list the number of men reading this on one finger and that would be my hubby.  ;-)  I know he puts a lot of pressure on himself.... but let's focus here.

Back to women.

We put so much pressure on ourselves to do it all. And do it right. And we look outside ourselves and our immediate worlds for help and advice.  And we get it. And then, we look back inside our world and realize we don't do things that way. And then we feel inferior. And ashamed.  And bad.

Then.. if you're like me... you go and make a plan to turn it around!  And be super organized  like the mom on that one blog... take pictures and document your kids' lives like the mom on another one .... and oh by the way, you want to do it all while working and supporting your family... while trying to maintain a level of fun, socialization and sex appeal (to aforementioned husband).

And then.... you fail.

Miserably fail.

And you beat the shit out of yourself for it... cuz it just seemed so easy and if you could just do it like everyone else says they do it... you just know you could be amazing.

What we all forget on a daily basis is that we are already amazing.  It just looks so different.  Because we all started from such different places.... our own amazing looks different than super amazing mommy blogger's amazing.

And no matter how hard I try - my pictures are never going to look like super amazing photo mommy blogger's photos.

Yet a piece of me feels inferior every time I read and see others' perceived perfection.

What did women do before? How did they parent so well and feel so much better before they had all so called "support?"  Cuz I am really beginning to question what sort of support we really have out there?????  Is it all just a contest for moms trying to prove that they can do this better than someone else.

I remember when I started blogging and joined Facebook that I felt really good. I felt like there were all these women who talked about some real shit and seemed supportive. And people COMMENTED and you felt like a community.

But that got lost somewhere along the way.  And people don't do that anymore.  Or maybe no one reads or cares to. Or maybe everyone feels like me and when you compare you life to someone else's you too feel inferior.

 I don't know. I feel that there's too much out there. That maybe we put too much out there. That in the quest to share and know one another, we have lost touch of what is real.... and we are relying on a virtual world... a virtual reality.

I went off Facebook and my mom said "now you have to call me."

That should go unsaid!  Now that my mom lives out of town again.... I SHOULD call her and she should call me and she should learn news of my kids and me.... from me.

And my friends should ask about my life because they care and they want to interact, and me in turn, theirs....

There is so much out there for the world to see, that we don't care about the things that matter anymore.  People put their pain out there and at first we think.... how brave. Then, we grow numb to it.  Glennon is a prime example.  She has a lot to share.  A lot of pain. And she is getting bashed instead of supported. Why put it out there at all?  And moreover, why the hell would you beat someone (you likely don't even KNOW!) when they're down????

I don't know.  I just get to thinking sometimes... and here I am.... writing in this virtual world about how much I question the fact that I am writing and choose to write in this virtual world.

That my friends is what you call IRONY.  :-)

Our world is growing but becoming less.  Feelings are made smaller.  Email makes us brave to say things we would never in person.  I have to teach my kids that now.  Never email something you wouldn't say to someones face.  Also - be so careful because the written word can be misconstrued every time.  Tone cannot be heard via text, email or blog.

Can you tell if I am angry, sad, indifferent or happy in this post? I doubt it.  ;-)

Tulip City Invitational....

Friday evening, we traveled up to Holland for Ally's next gymnastics meet - the Tulip City Invitational!  The majority of her team and their families went up Friday night and we all stayed together at the host hotel, as the girls' check in was at 8:00 am Saturday morning.

Upon arrival, there were some girls already in the pool... so of course, Ally and Luke headed straight there.  The parents sat and had some drinks and watched the kids swim for a bit.... then decided we had better feed everyone.  We headed right across the street to BW3s and at there. We didn't even have to get in our cars as we just walked right over.  We had dinner with some of the families... then headed back where the rest of the gang was swimming.

We probably let the girls stay up too late.... but it was so much fun for them to have that time together. Silliness in the pool.  Luke is always included in the fun. He is one lucky boy to have all those girls taking care of him.  

I love these girls.  They are so silly, fun and supportive of one another.  I love to watch them interact and watch their friendship grow as it has.  I feel very blessed to be a part of their lives and their families' lives!

Competition day came early - the 6:00 am wake up call came a little sooner than expected but everyone was excited for the meet!  It was awesome to have all our girls compete together from level Diamond down to Gold.... the older girls with the younger girls.  Ally did great!  She didn't medal, and of course, she was disappointed... but you can't medal every time and it was a wonderful life lesson for her!  She still stood by and clapped as her besties got medals and cheered her team on... because in the end, that's what it's all about. That.... and trying better next time!  I am always proud of my angel girl no matter how she does.  Medals are fun and exciting..... but the fact that she goes out there and does what she does, amazing me to the core every time!  What an experience to be a part of.

After the meet and the awards ceremony.... Ally walked over to me every so slightly defeated and cried for just a moment. Disappointed for certain.  One of the older girls (who medaled in every event, took first all-around and is one of Ally's besties' oldest sister) came over and talked to her.  She told her how proud she was of her. How she watches her in the gym every week and she knows how hard she works.  How wonderful a gymnast she is.  Then, she went on to tell us how she competed for years without every getting a medal... but she never, ever quit. And here she is now... all-around champ for her level at almost every meet.  She is amazing to watch and a genuinely amazing girl. Amazing girl. Gracious and not boastful.  Upon receiving her all around-medal, the first thing she does is lean toward the girl who earned second and third and tells them what a great job they did.  I love that Ally has this girl as a role model in her life.  I hope she grows up to be just like Mary Grace... and that she never takes anything she earns for granted. That she always shows the same gratitude and gives the same praise to others.

That was my favorite part of our day.

I can tell her over and over how proud I am.... but when a fellow gymnast you look up to says it with all the sincerity in the world.... it means a lot more to a ten year old girl.

Later.... as we were watching the really young girls in her gym compete - Ally says to me "Mommy, I DID do really good for me."  Yes... yes you did baby girl. You did GREAT for you.  You did GREAT period.  I hope you know that you are the most amazing girl I know and love!  :-)

Ally's routines from that day can be seen here:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NjwNjIRa6x8

Today....

Today is a good day. I am feeling the tide turning. Sickness is behind us. Weeks are normalizing. I worked this morning. Now, I would normally be working out but my partner bailed on me and I decided that was a sign from the gods that I should take myself over to AKA and have a late sushi lunch with myself.

So here I am.

I enjoy the solitude these days. Little moments. I never used to appreciate moments alone. Thought I had to fill my time. Always be with others. Now I appreciate these stolen moments.

I feel like today is one of those amazing balance days. Where I feel good about the life I live. I worked all day until now. Now, I get some time to sit still and reflect and enjoy something delicious.

I will pick the kids up soon and spend some time with them. Then, this evening I have a girls night out. Love the variety today brings.

Gonna enjoy. I hope you find a way to enjoy your day too!

Resurfacing...

The last two weeks (or more) have been a giant pile of SUCK. There's really no way to sugar coat it.  One week of the pukes. Another week of the flu. Even this week isn't going 100% as the kids try to regain their energy.  It has sucked. Really.

I almost lost it. Two weeks of staying home and in with the kids. They couldn't really go anywhere... they were too sick. Not to mention, it's not fair to others to continue to spread the wealth.  I wish more people would stay HOME with their sick kids. Then again, by this past Saturday, I was locked in the bathroom in the fetal position, crying because I couldn't take the fighting anymore. The kids have spent FAR to much time together.

My amazing hubby spent the day last Saturday moving his grandma... and then, came home to his wife having a breakdown... so he took the kids and went downstairs and kept them there, away from me, for hours. It was heaven. I watched a movie. I laid on the couch.  I loved every moment.

None of us had really done anything for weeks except go to work (Scott and I) for short spurts of time. We are a family usually on the go.. so this was a challenge to say the least. And the thing is... we all took turns being sick... so you would have one kid sick as hell and the other healthy, but we couldn't do anything cuz of sick kid #1 and then... the roles would reverse and everyone was just a giant pile of unhappy.

Please let it be over now.

Ally has a gymnastics meet in Holland this weekend. We are leaving early Friday and traveling up there to stay the night before as she has to check in at 8:00 am.  We are going to have a little dinner with some other families from the gym and let the kids enjoy some indoor pool time.  It should be a nice break.  I hope. Really, let's be honest.. I would look forward to anything that gets me out and away from here. ;-)

Tomorrow I have a girls' night out... THANK GOD.  Some girls and I are headed to Lansing for some spa time and a dinner out to Mitchell's Fish Market. YUM.... and fun. All in one little trip. Definitely looking forward to that!

Work is going well.... still loving my new calling and my job still doesn't feel like a job.  Luke got to work with me today.... and he was an angel boy. So, I rewarded him with some time at the bounce house... but his energy was low and he didn't last long.  Oh well. At least he got to do something.

Both kids missed their valentines parties. Big bummers all around.  I think Luke is giddy to return to school tomorrow and play and see his friends. Today at the bounce house I noticed he was interacting with other kids...  I am always amazed and proud to see him do this as he has come a long way in that department.  He's becoming quite the social little guy. I am proud of him for certain.

It's snowing today. I am over snow. I am thankful the end of February is near.  Spring cannot come soon enough in my opinion. The sun is not shining and that is depressing. If it's going to be cold and snow, the least the sun could do is shine. It is really so mood enhancing. Sigh.

Winter sucks.  I need to learn to love winter.

That said... we are going up north in a couple weeks to stay in a big ole house with a bunch of other families and try our luck at skiing!  It's something I've always wanted to try and Ally has really wanted to do.... I will probably hate it... but I want to try and at least we can get away with some super fun people and our kids and try to enjoy this winter wonderland.  Gotta learn to embrace this weather.  Hibernation is not the best option.... but it's what I gravitate toward.

Well, that was a bummer of a post.  ;-)  Complaining about sickness... staying home... but it happens. We all have our weeks of suck.  Here's hoping you are having a week of non-suck.  :-)

Mine is sure to turn around!

Ally's Bowling Party in Pictures....

Ally and her friends loved her bowling birthday party!  A great time was had by all!

Which End is Up?

What day is it again?  What a week.  Seriously.  Scott and Ally stayed home yesterday while Luke went to school and I went to work for the morning.  Ally was a mess.  Looked a mess and had a fever for three days.  A trip to the doc was in order.  I went home and got her.... ran to pick Luke up early to take him with me as her appointment was cutting it to close for me to get him after... and we got to the doc.

Hadn't been there since June of 2012 for their physicals.  We checked in and the nurse said to me "I jinxed you because I just asked someone if you had left our practice we hadn't seen you in so long." HA!  Nope... just usually have some healthy kids.  She looked up their histories.... prior to the June visit, we hadn't been there since January 2012 which was the last time Ally had strep.  Once in October of 2011 for her - strep again and their physicals the spring of 2011.  Luke went in once in early 2012 for a virus I had checked out.

No offense, I am happy to not see my pediatrician on a regular basis! But this time... we have been hit and hit hard.  They ran a strep test on Ally, which was negative. I was glad we didn't have to walk the antibiotic path. I had stepped up her acidophilus just in case though.  Next came the flu test.... positive for influenza B. Good times.  I guess B is more rare and mild than A which is good for her, but bad for us as Scott, Luke and I had A in November, which means... you guessed it... we can get this strain!!  Woo hoo!  ;-)

We won't though. Come on.  The flu we had in November was bad enough.  And then, our little tango with the Noro Virus last week. Not cool virus gods... not cool.

So.... with a diagnosis of Influenza B... Ally gets a solid week off school and we have quarantined ourselves for the week.

Add that to last weeks quarantine from the pukes and you get two kids and one mom who are losing their effing minds.  No joke.

Scott and I are trading off and on so I can work my hours and he stays home.... and he has been home sick (Noro got him early this week) too so it's worked out that I haven't had to miss anymore work than I had to last week.  But I am missing the days the office is closed and I am supposed to be going in to do the things I can't do when we see patients. Going on two weeks of a lack of that.... crap is piling up and I am feeling the weight of that on me.  Makes me feel just a little overwhelmed.

This has been the worst year for flu in a super long time the doc was telling me.  Each day they see 5 or 6 cases of the flu.  Awful.  These poor kids.  At least we are blessed with healthy kids that can fight this stuff off and it doesn't turn into secondary infections.  Ally woke up this morning and seemingly has turned the corner.  The last two days were really bad... and today she actually is bored and wants to do something. My girl is coming back. The hardest part is that she can't do anything for two more days. Prayers we all don't lose our minds!!!!!

So, since today is turning point day.... today will be another loving cleaning/organizing day... more ridding this house of virus.... and more cleaning out. My quarantine with Noro took twelve bags out of here.... I love cleaning OUT!  :-)

I am looking at the silver lining in all of this as I always try to do.  Better this week than any other.  Next weekend, Ally has another meet up in Holland and she is sure to want to be healthy enough to participate in that.  With the worst behind her, we can now focus on regaining strength and getting her energy back.  We only had plans for tomorrow night this weekend, so hopefully we can still go out as the kids were staying home with a sitter anyway. There should be no more contagious element around once I clean and they are past their contagious stage..... so Scott and I definitely deserve the evening OUT!  Gotta break out of this place!  Fingers crossed that can happen!

Here's to health!  We all deserve it!

Goodbye FB...

Said my annual Lenten farewell to Facebook today. It feels so good to delete it off my phone! I will still need to check it now and then. Ally's gym does a lot of communicating on our page there. Stella and Dot stuff with my page. But eliminating it from my phone takes it away from my fingertips. Time waster eliminated. :-)

Ally and I are also giving up Instagram together!!!! Bye bye social media!

I am sleeping on the couch - or not sleeping rather since I am posting this. Ally is with me on her mattress on the floor. Scott is as sick as can be in our bed. Good times here. Good times.

Neither Scott nor Ally will make an appearance at work or school tomorrow. I have made arrangements with my amazing cousin to help me with Luke in the morning so I don't get to work too terribly late. But I will be late! Family first.

Here's hoping I get a few hours tonite. And make it through the day tomorrow!!!!!

Too Much Sickness....

Last Monday, Ally came home from school with a headache.  She barely ate dinner.... and even though she was dressed and ready to go to dance, she announced that she didn't think she could go.  She laid down on the couch.

I honestly didn't think much of it. I had just had a CRAP day and had brought a pile of work home.  I sat at the table and was slowly working my way through a mess better known as the insurance puzzle.  I was trying to figure some things out... Scott was making juice.... Luke was being, well Luke.... and the next thing we know, Ally is puking her guts out.

Lovely.

At least she made it to the bathroom.  Thank God for small favors.

So.... Scott and I work to get Luke down and settle in for the night we know is ahead of us.  When Ally pukes, Ally PUKES!  It is never short and sweet.... it's usually violent and lasts for at least 12 to 24 hours.

Scott takes the first shift.... and I finish my work. The first shift consists of dealing with the first puke session and then, Ally sleeps for a couple hours.  That boy got off easy.  ;-)

We put her to bed, feeling hopeful. She hasn't thrown up in a while... maybe, just maybe she will sleep and it will be past us!!!!!

(yeah - right)

I hear her throwing up almost instantly.... into a bowl. I take it, clean it and return it. This happens a couple more times only minutes apart instead of hours.  So, she and I get up and set up camp in the living room.  She needs to be distracted in between the barfing as she is just so miserable.  24 hour Disney Channel to the rescue.  All night long, until 6:30 am.... she constantly retches and throws up.... it is violent. She has issues from the other end beginning around 3:00 am. I have not seen anything like it. She has burst all the blood vessels in her eyes. She can barely stand up.  It is a bad scene.

At 6:30 she finally falls asleep and stays asleep. Scott comes out and send me to bed to get a few hours of sleep. He goes into work later. She sleeps for a bit, wakes up and drinks some Rock and Rye because she needs something with taste. It stays down for a bit... but eventually returns to the outside world.  This is the last time she will vomit.... it's violent and awful.... but she literally passes out on the couch after and sleeps until after 3 in the afternoon....

Luke is an angel all day long. He knows he needs to be and I am so thankful.  I was so out of it.  Had a headache all day and could hardly cope with the no sleep.  I thank god every day we are done with children!  OMG the sleep deprivation after a day almost killed me. I am apparently officially too old for no sleep!  ;-)

Ally is able to eat some soup and drink some gatorade later in the day... somehow, someway we survived.

Wednesday, everyone goes to school and work..... the day seems easy enough.  Then, the call from Luke comes at 4:00 am.... he has vomited all over his bed. That's the difference between a 10 and a five year old. One gets the bowl or toilet. The other, just doesn't get it at all.  Especially a kid who has only thrown up one other time in his life. Ally's an old pro. Luke, a beginner.

So, after two vomit sessions in bed... Luke and I head to the living room for another morning and day of the couch/vomit routine.  At least he let me sleep until 4!!!!!!  He never did throw up again.. but fought the fever and aches that come with the stomach virus from hell.

Scott comes home early, not feeling quite right (this is Thursday)... but although he has the aches and pains and cannot get warm... he never tosses his cookies.

Then, at 2:00 am Friday morning... it's my turn. I wake with a start and instantly know it has gotten me. I promptly walk into the hall bathroom and lose whatever I have eaten for the last 24 hours.  That will be the only time I throw up... thank god. The aches and pains however, will last the rest of the day.

Saturday, I still have no energy and I feel nauseated all day long..... we do nothing except take Ally to and from gymnastics.

Sunday, we take it easy... I do attend a little wine/bachelorette event and enjoy a couple glasses, but other than that, my appetite is limited and my wine intake low.

Monday, Ally wakes up with a headache but goes to school.  I dismiss it, thinking she is just dehydrated and needs to get out of the house and slam some water.  She comes home feeling worse... and wakes in the middle of the night with a fever and a croup-sounding cough. Sore throat. Limited voice.

Lovely.

And... by the way... WTF???  We have had enough.

But, the icing on the proverbial cake is that at 1:00 pm today Scott calls and announces he is once again on his way home with the chills, aches to the bone and takes a bowl with him to bed.  Can this really be another week from hell????

Here at the McIntosh family we don't get colds too often... we can shake the every day things... but apparently we do get the most evil of viruses..... we have the real deal flu this past November... and now this.... even though I was pretty sure I announced that we were to be illness free because of November... the illness gods did not listen!

Lordy day. Pray for all of us.  There are two evil bugs going around and we got them both.  Lucky us!!!!!!!!!!!